A Team
by Aranelle
Summary: AU. Also known, in my head, as: "In Which Kendall is a Hooker." Kendall is hired to be Carlos's date for an evening.
1. Chapter 1

Dedicated to my best friend **Breila Rose**, who wrote her own amazing fic with the same basic premise for the LiveJournal Big Bang. There are some similarities between both of these fics, as this was inspired by her, but the similarities pretty much end end at prostitution, since this was written months before the vast majority of its inspiration and I intentionally took it in an entirely different direction. I credit her fully with the idea, though, and recommend everyone read her fic, which can be found linked in my profile since the documents are a bitch and won't let me encrypt the URL without making it way too difficult.

This been sitting on my laptop for months and months and refuses to end - 30k+ words already, we'll see where it ends up. This will definitely end up with more chapters than anything I've ever written before.

Warnings for mild angst and prostitution, and also for moments of disgusting sappy fluff. You have been warned.

Title taken from Ed Sheeran's song of the same name, as it's appropriate since, you know. Kendall covered it and all.

Also, thank yous and love forever to my betas **Clarry **and **Breila Rose** - I couldn't do this without you both. **  
**

* * *

Carlos looks up from the desk in his office when he hears a knock, smiling when he sees his best friend standing in the doorway. He motions Logan in and kicks the chair across from his desk out, shoving his restaurant's latest expense reports to Logan once he's seated.

"You sure you don't want to work for me so I don't have to make this budget?" he asks with what he hopes is a charming smile. Logan just laughs and shoves the papers back.

"You know you can hire people to do this shit."

Carlos lets out an exasperated noise at Logan's suggestion and pushes the papers back to Logan.

"Did you not just hear me? I know you don't really want to be a doctor."

"No, not at all. It's not like I've spent the last decade of my life studying to be one," Logan laughs. "Hire someone, idiot. They have people that specialize in this kind of thing."

Carlos groans. Hiring people means he might eventually have to fire them, and he hates having to do that. He's had this restaurant for three years now; it's his entire life, ever since he opened it on what basically ended up being a whim after graduating college - he's still not really sure what made him decide to go through with opening it.

He blames Logan for challenging him. He never turns down a challenge.

It wasn't at all where he'd pictured himself ending up; he'd been sure he'd have a more glamorous job like stunt driving or being an action movie star but now that he'd finally made a name for himself it was kind of awesome.

"Maybe," he allows, fixing Logan with a wicked grin. "Can't you just clone yourself? One of you can be the doctor and the other can be my bitch."

"Nice try, asshole. How have you managed to keep this restaurant afloat for so long when you can't even manage a budget for it?" Logan laughs at the indignation on Carlos's face and reaches across the desk to shove at him playfully.

"Come on, I'm here to take you out. Get your shit, James is waiting in the car."

"Fuck off," Carlos says, but he's grinning. "I don't need to spend all night watching you make eyes at your supermodel boyfriend."

"You know you wouldn't have to if you found your own," Logan quips, ducking a swat from Carlos as Carlos stands and gathers his things.

"I don't have time to date, you know that."

"Make time," Logan responds, all but dragging Carlos out of his office. "You could, you know."

"Whatever." Carlos shrugs Logan's hand off him as they head out to James's car, climbing into the back seat and clapping James on the shoulder from behind.

"James agrees with me, you know," Logan says as he slides into the passenger seat and buckles.

"I agree with you about what?" James asks curiously before shooting Carlos a grin. "Hey, dude. What am I taking Logan's side on?"

"Me dating," Carlos says, flicking the back of Logan's head as James starts driving. "Your asshole boyfriend thinks I need one of my own, as he put it."

"He does!" Logan protests, and Carlos laughs as Logan tries to swat his hand away as if it were a bug.

"Probably," James agrees, smirking at Carlos in the rearview mirror. "Don't look at me like that, you know damn well you're lonely."

"You both fucking suck," Carlos mutters. "Where are we going?"

"A bar James knows," Logan responds, and Carlos represses the urge to gag when they smile at each other, all lovesick puppy gazes and really, they don't need to rub that in his face.

As they drive he ponders what they both said, knowing they're right on some level. He stares out the window and thinks about the last time he had a real relationship-it was well before his restaurant took off. Once that happened he gave up trying to date, because it wasn't fair for anyone he was with to have to deal with him basically constantly working.

Still, he muses, he's happy where he is. Love just complicates things, and now that his restaurant is one of the most popular new places in Los Angeles Carlos knows he doesn't want to add anything to the mix that might mess that up.

Focus on what's important, he reminds himself.

The bar turns out to be really awesome. James knows everyone, which means they get treated like rock stars, and since James kind of is Carlos finds it appropriate. Logan's totally trashed and hanging all over James as he drives them all home that night, but still manages to turn back to Carlos with a drunken evil grin.

Carlos knows he's going to have nightmares featuring that look.

"Jamie, we should find Carlitos a boyfriend," Logan slurs, turning to press open mouthed, sloppy kisses to James's neck and laughing when James tries to shove him off.

"Carlitos is just fine the way he is," Carlos says, not quite drunk enough to be able to forget what he's seeing right now. "Dude, you can have sex with James once we're home, cool it."

"No, Jamie seriously, let's find him someone," Logan insists, muffled from where he's attacking James's neck again. "They have like, agencies you can call to get dates and shit."

"You are _not_ getting me a hooker," Carlos says drily. "If I want a whore I can just go back to that bar."

"He has a point, Carlos." James shoves Logan back into his seat. "Sit there, we're almost home, you animal. But Carlos, seriously. There are agencies out there that just let you get a date, it's not a hooker."

"No," Carlos says firmly, although he sort of realizes that he's lonely when he thinks about it. James lets it drop and Carlos doesn't make an effort to restart the conversation until they're back to the house that Carlos and Logan own. James carries Logan, who's passed out, inside and up to his and Logan's bedroom, and as Carlos climbs into bed he wishes for the first time in a long time that he wasn't going to bed alone.

* * *

It's a few days later before Logan brings up the "dating services" thing again.

Carlos had really been hoping he would have forgotten, since he was so wasted.

"So seriously," Logan begins after he's cornered Carlos in the living room, "I think you need to call one of those agencies. What's the worst case scenario?"

"AIDS," Carlos says flatly, trying to shove Logan away from the couch he's sitting on. "What makes you think a hooker is going to solve the problems you seem to think I have?"

"I'm not talking a hooker, idiot."

"Oh, sorry. I figured paying someone to date me pretty much constitutes that."

"No, dickwad. I looked into it, there're ones that literally just pair you up with a date for something." Logan leans in and flicks Carlos's forehead. "And you have that thing coming up, that restaurant convention whatever. You need a date to it."

"No, I don't," Carlos says firmly. Logan looks at him critically, and Carlos knows that look on his face. He's plotting.

"Whatever you're thinking, no."

"Like you'd turn away a hot guy if he just showed up here," Logan says with a smirk.

"I would if he got money to show up," Carlos says. "Will you just go the fuck away already? Where's James, he should be distracting you."

"Photo shoot," Logan says simply, plopping down next to Carlos. "My undivided attention is all yours."

"When the hell did you become so annoying?" Carlos asks exasperatedly. "That's supposed to be me."

"I'm just looking out for you. Seriously." Logan fixes Carlos with a look, and Carlos can see that Logan's actually worried about him. "You haven't dated anyone for years, Carlos. Not since Derek, and I know you think you hid that it ended bad, but I know you. I know you're lonely, and even if you used one of those things it doesn't make you a bad person. No one's gonna judge you."

"Whatever, Logan." Carlos sighs and leans his head back against the couch, his eyes sliding closed. "I can't stop you, but I wish you wouldn't. I don't need to pay someone to date me."

"It's one time. At the very least it'll remind you that you're an awesome guy that deserves an awesome boyfriend."

Carlos opens his eyes and looks at Logan critically. He hates when Logan gets all smart on him.

"Whatever," he says with a shrug.

"You do."

"Okay. I still don't see the need to pay someone to date me, though."

Carlos knows he's won for now when he hears Logan sigh.

"Fine. Just think about it, okay?"

"Yeah, okay," Carlos says, knowing that in the long run, he's not going to win this argument.

* * *

Kendall sighs and slumps against the door of his apartment once it's shut; that had easily been the longest night of his life, and he's worked a lot of them.

Keys are hung on the hook by the door and his jacket is tossed at the couch before he manages to drag himself to the shower; he feels dirty.

He always feels dirty after a night like tonight.

He feels hazy as he starts the shower and climbs in, sighing in appreciation as the hot water hits his skin. Soap, lather, rinse, repeat. It's rhythmic, muscle memory.

He scrubs and scrubs. Nothing is enough.

As he falls into bed he wonders how he ended up here, like he wonders every night. He checks his phone. Nothing.

It's a blessing, this time. Normally calls from the agency mean good money, but after his ten hour shift waiting tables at his new job at some fancy restaurant in downtown Los Angeles, meeting a client was the absolute last thing on his list of things he wanted to do. He doesn't need another one, not tonight; one was enough. First days on the job are always the hardest, and he didn't even get to meet the owner.

Still, he isn't stupid enough to turn down money like that, not when he's got rent due in three days. Between that, and tuition, he'd pretty much have to take another client, as much as he doesn't want to.

He hates himself for where he's managed to end up. Three years ago he had everything; a college scholarship, a career as a star hockey player in front of him, a great girlfriend, and just like that it all disappeared.

Kendall kind of wishes getting hit by a drunk driver didn't make him swear off alcohol, because he could use it sometimes. The accident had damaged his knees, and the doctors told him he'd never play hockey again without surgery Kendall knew he'd never be able to afford.

He'd been crushed. Hockey and school both disappeared almost overnight; since he couldn't play, his scholarship money dried up and since that had been his only way of paying for college, he'd dropped out and started waiting tables to avoid living on the street.

As he was walking home his first night he was stopped by someone asking if he'd like to make extra money. He'd been intrigued.

The only good things to come out of this, he supposes, are that it opened his eyes to a side of his sexuality he never knew existed. Sex with men is just as good as with women; better, a lot of the time, in his opinion. He was also able to start taking a few classes at the UCLA again with the extra money he makes from the agency.

Before he really knew what had happened Kendall found himself working for an escort service.

A prostitute, he reminds himself. He's a hooker. Call boy, whore, the names for what he does are endless. There's not always sex, because his agency offers companionship too, but if the pay is good enough Kendall doesn't usually have a lot of qualms. The agency is just this side of legit; since it helps its clients set up sex for an extra fee, but enough of the escorts don't hook for the agency to pass itself as legitimate.

He _hates_ himself. As he starts to doze off he sees a message pop up on the phone the agency gave him; they've got a potential client lined up for him for some restaurant convention in a few days. Companionship. No sex.

Kendall sighs and responds with an agreement to take it, hating himself more with every second. As he finally falls asleep he's visited by dreams of hockey and what could have been.


	2. Chapter 2

Thank you to everyone for your patience with me for taking this down. I strongly recommend everyone read the fic that inspired this - _Whatever Happens_, by **Breila Rose**.

* * *

Carlos is surprised that Logan drops the idea of buying him a hooker as a date for his convention. He's finally made a name for himself in the industry, the last thing he needs is to show up at an event like this with a trashy whore on his arm.

There's a part of him that's unnerved by Logan's silence on the matter.

Logan keeps shooting him furtive glances as he's getting ready that afternoon; it's a black tie event, more a party than a convention, so Carlos has been taking his time and making sure he looks his best. As he's surveying himself in the mirror he hears the doorbell ring.

His heart sinks.

He rushes to get the door before Logan can, opening it and seeing a young guy about his age on the doorstep. He breathes a sigh of relief at the sight of the guy; clearly Logan respected his wishes and didn't buy him a date.

"Can I help you?" he asks the guy curiously, a thought visiting him in the back of his mind that it's a shame the guy isn't here to be his date, he's really hot.

"I'm Kendall," the guy says, smiling charmingly at Carlos. "The agency sent me. Are you Carlos?"

Son of a _bitch_.

"Logan!" Carlos turns and bellows into the house before fixing Kendall with an apologetic smile.

"I think there's been some mistake, but come in." He's not sure why he's inviting the guy in, but he'd feel bad slamming the door on him. Logan walks into the foyer with a big shit eating grin on his face and looks Kendall over appraisingly.

"Come here so I can kill you, you fucking asshole," Carlos growls, grabbing Logan and dragging him into the den. "What the hell were you thinking? I asked you not to do this!"

"Oh stop it, he doesn't look like a whore. That's why I picked him." Logan shrugs Carlos's hand off him.

"You piece of shit, do you _hear_ yourself?" Carlos hisses. "You sound like you're buying a dog."

"Shut the fuck up and just take him with you," Logan says, his eyes flashing as he meets Carlos's glare. "And don't fucking talk to me like that, I know damn well he's a person. He also knows all he's here for is to be on your arm and look pretty, I told them no sex. It doesn't have to be as big of a deal as you're making it."

"I hate you right now, Logan, I really do," Carlos shoots back before turning on his heel and heading back into the foyer, where Kendall is standing. He looks as uncomfortable as Carlos feels.

"I don't have to stay if you'd rather. Your friend paid in advance," Kendall says hesitantly, and Carlos sighs to himself; he can't turn the guy away, not when he looks so pitiful and really fucking hot all at once. The least Carlos can do is show him a nice time for his trouble.

"It's okay, I don't want to make this more awkward than it already is. It wouldn't kill me to have someone to talk to." Carlos shoots Logan another glare as he walks past. "I just need to get my jacket and we can go. Do you need anything before we leave?"

"No, thanks. I'm good." Kendall shakes his head as he answers, and Carlos wonders what the hell he's supposed to do with this guy all night. He grabs his jacket and leads Kendall to his car, and Kendall shoots him a hesitant smile once they're buckled.

"I'm sorry about all that," Carlos says with a sigh as he pulls out of the driveway, and Kendall just laughs softly.

"I've seen worse reactions. Better, too," he muses, and Carlos feels like shit now. Kendall must see that on his face, because he reaches across the center console to squeeze Carlos's arm.

"It doesn't have to be awkward, you know. Just think of me as a blind date that your friend set you up on."

"It's hard to forget that he paid you to be here. He must really think I'm pathetic." As soon as the words leave Carlos's mouth he regrets them, wincing at how awful they sound.

"I didn't mean it like that."

"It's okay," Kendall says softly. "I know what I am."

Carlos didn't think it was possible for him to feel worse.

"I'm sorry," he says, and an awkward silence falls over them. It lasts until they reach the banquet hall, and Carlos turns to Kendall once he shuts the car off.

"Seriously, I'm really sorry. I didn't mean for it to come out like that. I just meant that Logan must think I'm too pathetic to get my own dates so he did it for me."

Kendall nods and offers Carlos an almost shy smile that makes his heart flutter.

"Okay. Come on, let's go have a good time," Kendall says. Carlos walks around the car to open Kendall's door before handing the valet the keys, nerves hitting him. He's never done anything like this before. Kendall smiles at him and takes his hand to squeeze it reassuringly.

"So what is this thing?" Kendall asks once they're checked in, his hand secure around Carlos's. Carlos gets them drinks and they begin to walk around, his breath catching every time he sees someone famous.

"It's basically a big party," Carlos explains, nodding to a few people here and there that he knows. "Networking, publicity, schmoozing, all that. Stuff I'm not good at."

Kendall nods and Carlos has to hand it to him, he looks like he really cares. The longer they mingle and make small talk the more comfortable Carlos becomes, and Kendall falls into the role of his "date" easily.

* * *

After an hour or so they make their way over to their table before dinner starts; Carlos is kind of desperate for a break from all this small talk. Kendall doesn't seem to mind, and since Carlos is nothing if not a gentleman he pulls Kendall's chair out for him and gets him a drink.

The look Kendall fixes him with rattles him-like he's never had someone treat him this nicely.

"Do you have plans for the night?" he asks in Kendall's ear once he's seated too.

Kendall looks at Carlos in surprise and tilts his head to murmur back in Carlos's ear, "I thought you didn't want sex."

"I don't. I don't sleep with anyone on the first date." Carlos sighs softly. "I just...miss having someone, as pathetic as it sounds - just spend the night with me? No sex, not that you're not hot enough, but…you know. If uh. It's extra or something that's okay."

This is easily the most uncomfortable conversation Carlos has ever had, and he has no idea why he's asking a hooker to spend the night with him - it's been nice, though, having someone on his arm like this. The problem is that it woke up that uncomfortable lonely feeling he's spent years ignoring, and there's something about Kendall - Carlos doesn't know if Kendall's acting or if he's genuine, but he wants to figure it out. Kendall shakes his head and smiles again, that same look of almost disbelief in his eyes.

"Your friend paid more than enough, don't worry about it. Are you sure you want me to stay?"

"I wouldn't ask if I didn't," Carlos says honestly. "But you don't have to if you don't want to." When Kendall shrugs Carlos frowns.

"I don't mind staying," Kendall says. "You're a nice guy, it's not like spending time with you is torture."

"Thanks," Carlos said, leaning over on an impulse and kissing Kendall's cheek. "You seem like a pretty nice guy too."

Carlos finds himself smiling when Kendall blushes.

"Thanks," Kendall says softly, reaching out to take Carlos's hand.

"I call it like I see it." Carlos squeezes Kendall's hand and smiles.

"So how'd you get into this business?" Kendall asks curiously after a moment of silence.

"Accidentally," Carlos replies with a laugh. "My-" Carlos breaks off as he remembers Logan's attitude earlier, "-for argument's sake he's still my friend, but Logan. The guy you met at the house. I took a cooking class in college and he made fun of me for it and joked I should open a restaurant, and once I graduated I did, to spite him."

"And look where you ended up." Kendall laughs and his hand settles behind Carlos's neck, casually playing with his hair. It makes him shiver.

"Yeah," he agrees. "I hired some really good people and when James, Logan's boyfriend, moved in with us he helped me promote it. That was when it really took off."

"James?" Kendall asks curiously. "How'd he help?"

"He's a model, really popular," Carlos explains. "James Diamond, do you know him?"

"Yeah. Wow, that's awesome." Kendall looks impressed, but then smiles at Carlos again. "He's got nothing on you, though."

Carlos feels himself blush. This guy is good.

"Shut up and drink your wine," he says with a grin. Kendall just smiles at him, and it makes his heart flutter again.

He tries to avoid thinking about whether or not Kendall's acting a part and instead focuses on enjoying himself as they get up after a little while to continue mingling.

* * *

The enormity of this event takes Kendall by surprise - he'd been expecting some kind of-well, something not this. He's been doing his best to be a model date, the last thing he wants is for someone to judge Carlos because of him. That would have a lot of bad consequences.

Carlos seems to enjoy his company, making sure he has a drink and introducing him to everyone, and it makes Kendall feel like Carlos actually wants him there.

The feeling does a lot of strange, dangerous things to Kendall's heart; he can't start falling for this guy. The problem is that none of his clients have ever treated him like this, like he's just another guy and not just someone to fuck.

They take a break from mingling for a little bit and just wander - Carlos wasn't kidding, he _is_ bad at schmoozing. It doesn't seem like he's easily intimidated, not to Kendall anyway, but some of these famous people that Kendall recognizes from the Food Network are definitely doing it, and it's clearly not helping Carlos make any business connections.

Eventually Kendall can't help himself; once they make their way back out into the crowd they end up talking with some guy whose name Kendall can't remember but is definitely one of those famous tv chefs, and Carlos keeps tripping over his words as he tries to explain why investing in his restaurant is a good business venture.

"I just don't know that I want to take the risk," Famous Guy says, and Kendall frowns as he sees Carlos's face fall. "It's still so new."

"Maybe so, but think about how fast he's come onto the scene." Kendall immediately jumps in, making air quotes and fixing the guy with his most charming smile. "James Diamond is also practically his spokesperson, Carlos's revenue reports would show that it was after James endorsed his restaurant that it really took off. How can you turn down a place endorsed by one of the most popular celebrities out there?"

"Is he?" Famous Guy asks curiously, looking at Carlos. "You didn't mention that."

"It's easy to forget how famous James is when you live with him," Kendall says with a laugh as he squeezes Carlos's hand, making sure Famous Guy focuses on him. "James's boyfriend is Carlos's roommate."

"Really," Famous Guy muses, obviously intrigued, and Kendall feels his heart skip a beat when Carlos shoots him a grateful smile. "Okay. Let me think it over a little bit more, but I'll be in touch later in the week to get this going."

The elation in Carlos's face as they shake hands and set up a meeting makes Kendall's heart swell. Once Famous Guy walks away Carlos turns to Kendall, his excitement palpable.

"Do you know who that _was_?"

"Kind of," Kendall says honestly. "I can't remember his name."

"Michael Symon," Carlos says, and he's practically bouncing now. "He's like, one of the most popular new chefs on tv right now, and he wants to invest in me!"

After a split second Carlos falls perfectly still and fixes Kendall with a searching look.

"Thanks to you," he says with a smile. "You have no idea what this is going to do for me."

"I'm glad I could help," Kendall says with a smile. Carlos takes his hand again and squeezes, and as they walk off to meet with more people Kendall feels his heart flutter again.

Somewhere in the back of his mind he realizes that he's screwed.

* * *

Carlos is surprised by how much he's enjoying himself tonight; Kendall is the perfect date, all casual touches and laughter at Carlos's bad jokes, and he listens intently to everything Carlos explains about the event.

Despite knowing better than to get emotionally attached, Carlos finds that he really likes this guy. As dessert is served Kendall shoots Carlos a look that's shy and mischievous all at once, and then holds a forkful of his cheesecake to Carlos's mouth.

If he's trying to be seductive it's really working.

"Good, right?" Kendall asks as Carlos accepts the mouthful, and Carlos is mindful of people watching them. He nods in approval and makes a mental note to add cheesecake to his restaurant's dessert menu, wondering why the hell he never did. "Does your place have cheesecake?"

"No, but it's going to," Carlos responds with a laugh. "It's got everything else, though."

"I'll have to eat there some time," Kendall says with a smile, and it looks so _genuine_.

"Let me know when you want to and you can." Carlos smiles back, his hand coming up to grip Kendall's arm as it plays with his hair. "Anything you want, it'll be on me."

"Careful, 'anything' could be dangerous." Kendall smirks and leans in to whisper in Carlos's ear, "I could decide I want you."

Carlos is reasonably certain he's really fucking red right now. Kendall pulls back and laughs but his hand stays where it is. Carlos glares half heartedly at him.

"Ass," he mutters, but he can't help the smile on his face. Kendall just shakes his head and pushes his chair back, smiling indulgently.

"I'll be right back," he says, leaning down to drop a kiss on Carlos's cheek. "If you've never had a quickie in the bathroom now is the time to follow me."

"Not on my list of places to do that." Carlos laughs and bats Kendall away. "Just go, I'll wait here."

As Kendall walks away Carlos wonders at him; he knows it's probably all just an act, but damn if it isn't working a little.

He returns his attention to his plate and finishes his dessert, eyes automatically glancing around the room for Kendall every so often.

* * *

There's a part of Kendall that can't quite believe what's happening tonight as he walks to the bathroom; he doesn't have to use it, but he did need to get away for a minute.

Carlos is _amazing_.

Kendall's positive that it's just because Carlos feels sorry for him; because of what he said in the car or just because of what Kendall is - Kendall can't decide. It doesn't really matter, and Kendall has to not get hung up on Carlos and how amazing he is.

But then again, maybe he doesn't feel sorry for him; the look on Carlos's face when Kendall had helped him with the investor seemed so genuine.

He can't think like that. If he gets attached he's in big trouble.

He spends a good five minutes in the bathroom reminding himself of all the reasons he's not ever allowed to fall for his clients, and that Carlos wouldn't ever love him anyway before he heads back out into the banquet hall.

The problem, he muses as he walks, is that he's already fallen.

* * *

After close to ten minutes of Kendall being gone Carlos begins to wonder what's taking him so long. He swivels in his chair and looks around the room for Kendall, finally spotting him in the far corner.

And something about what he's looking at isn't right. Kendall's leaning back against a wall with his arms folded, and there's a way older guy leaning into him, his hand braced on the wall next to Kendall's head. To someone glancing at them Carlos thinks it'd probably just look like an intimate conversation, but there's an edge to the way Kendall is standing, a hostility to the way he's looking at this guy that's probably got twenty years on him.

Carlos gets up and strides over, his arms folding once he's stopped next to them.

"Is there a problem here?" he asks, mindful not to raise his voice, but it's firm. The guy turns to shoot him a disdainful look, but Carlos doesn't miss the relief in Kendall's face.

"We're fine, just arranging a little business," the older guy says, and as he speaks Carlos recognizes him; he's the owner of one of the other big name restaurants near Carlos's. Carlos quails at the animosity in his gaze, but the look on Kendall's face is enough to spur him on and he stands his ground.

"I don't think he's interested." Carlos moves to pull Kendall away from the guy, whose name he can't remember right now, but the guy grabs Kendall and holds him fast.

"I think with enough money he will be. I'll give you your whore back when I'm finished with him, Mr. Garcia, don't worry."

It's the way Kendall's face falls at his words, though he masks it well, that makes Carlos snap. He steps up close and lowers his voice.

"I don't think you want anyone to know what you're doing right now," he growls dangerously. "Take your hands off him or I'll make damn sure everyone knows what you do with your free time."

"You were the one that brought him here," the guy-Anderson, Carlos finally remembers-sneers disdainfully. "You don't think they'll judge you too?"

"Kendall's been a friend of mine for years, my relationship with him is none of your business," Carlos responds easily, pulling Kendall out of Anderson's grip and away.

He's had enough at this point, and leads Kendall outside the banquet hall into the night air. Kendall's hands are shoved deep in his pockets and he looks so ashamed of himself Carlos can't stand it.

"I'm sorry," Kendall says after a moment, not meeting Carlos's gaze. "He's uh. A client of the agency, of mine, I guess. He recognized me and wanted to take me home tonight and got pissed off when I said I didn't have time for him. I really hope I didn't ruin your reputation or anything."

"Stop that," Carlos says firmly, and Kendall winces. Carlos closes the distance between them and tilts Kendall's chin so they're looking each other in the eye.

"It's okay, you didn't ruin anything. He doesn't need to treat you like that, like you're a piece or meat."

"That's basically what I am, though." Kendall's voice is barely audible, and Carlos wants to go back inside and kick the shit out of Anderson for existing.

"You're not," he says firmly. "Not even close."

The shrug Kendall answers with breaks Carlos's heart a little. He reaches up to cup Kendall's cheek, wanting to wipe the shame off his face.

"C'mon, why don't we get out of here?" he suggests, and Kendall shrugs again.

"Whatever you want, it doesn't matter what I think."

Carlos feels an urge to shake Kendall and hug him all at the same time. He sighs and takes Kendall by the elbow to lead him back to the valet, silent as they wait for his car.

"I'm sorry," Kendall says again once they're in the car and driving home; he won't meet Carlos's eyes. Carlos lets out an exasperated noise and reaches over the center console to take Kendall's hand and squeeze it.

"Stop apologizing, you didn't do anything wrong."

"That could've ruined your reputation, though," Kendall protests, but he doesn't pull his hand away.

Carlos turns to look at him when they're at a stoplight.

"Probably," he agrees, and Kendall's face falls. "But my reputation isn't worth standing by while a creepy fuck like that basically forces himself on you."

"Who am I, though?" Kendall's voice is defeated. "Just some whore."

"You're a person, Kendall," Carlos says simply. "How you make a living is your own business, but doing what you do doesn't make you less than a person."

When he looks over again he could swear he sees Kendall trying to hold back tears.

"Do you still want to stay the night?" Carlos asks softly as he pulls into the driveway and shuts the car off. "I can take you home otherwise. It's up to you."

"I'll stay," Kendall all but whispers, turning to fix Carlos with a smile. "If you still want me to."

"I told you, I wouldn't ask if I didn't." Carlos smiles and leans over to kiss Kendall's cheek, gentle and reassuring.

"Okay." Kendall turns his head when Carlos starts to lean back and pulls him in to kiss his lips, and even though it's chaste it's the best kiss he's ever had.

"What was that for?" Carlos asks, settling back into his seat, and Kendall shrugs.

"I wanted to."

Carlos smiles in understanding.

"Come on, let's go inside. Do you want to shower or anything?"

"No, I'm okay." Kendall shoots Carlos an almost shy smile as they walk in and head upstairs to Carlos's bedroom.

And Carlos suddenly feels extremely awkward again. He looks around uncomfortably until Kendall seems to finally take pity on him and starts laughing.

"You've never brought someone home like this, have you," he says knowingly, and Carlos flushes.

"No," he retorts defensively. "I told you, I don't fuck on the first date."

"But you've spent the night with people, yes?"

Not in way too long, Carlos thinks. He nods in agreement and Kendall watches him for a long moment, seeming to war with himself before he smiles and and walks up to Carlos.

"Don't over think this," he murmurs as he unties Carlos's bow tie and helps him out of his jacket. "We're not having sex, you said so yourself. Don't let it be a big deal."

Carlos nods again as Kendall unbuttons his shirt, half wishing he wanted to fuck Kendall tonight; there are so many reasons he won't. When Carlos is down to his boxers Kendall steps back and surveys him with a grin.

"You're gorgeous."

"Shut up." Carlos feels himself blushing and pulls Kendall in to help him undress too, wondering what the hell has gotten into him as he undoes Kendall's pants and waits for him to step out of them once they've fallen to the floor.

"You are," Kendall says as he leads Carlos over to the bed and sits down, looking up at him with that almost shy look again.

"Can I kiss you?" he asks, voice barely above a whisper. Carlos nods and climbs onto the bed next to Kendall, a tiny whine knocked out of him when Kendall lifts him up and onto his lap, a firm kiss pressed to his lips once he's settled.

"You're an amazing kisser," Kendall murmurs softly, and his voice is pure sex, sending shivers up Carlos's spine.

"So are you. Are you trying to seduce me?" Carlos is suddenly breathless and has to pull away, the irrational part of his mind hoping the answer is yes. Kendall chuckles and lays them down, cuddling up to Carlos's side.

"Just sleep," he hums, leaning up for one more kiss, and Carlos nods his agreement.

"I had a good time tonight," Carlos says with a smile. "Thanks."

"It's my job," Kendall says, but Carlos sees him smile back. "Goodnight, Carlos."

"Night, Kendall."

* * *

Kendall lies awake for a long time after Carlos falls asleep, going back and forth between berating himself for his actions and wondering how to make this last.

He's never felt _anything_ like what he feels with Carlos.

The rational part of his mind reminds him that Carlos only thinks of him as a hooker; the only reason he's here is so Carlos has a warm body to sleep next to. He's not even appealing enough for sex.

Kendall mentally slaps himself for coming on too strong once they'd gotten back. He hadn't been able to help himself, Carlos was there and alone and he seems like everything Kendall's ever wanted and he hadn't fought any of Kendall's advances and it just wasn't _fair_.

It was Carlos's question of Kendall seducing him that had stopped Kendall cold. He knew then that he'd gone too far.

Still, he hadn't been able to resist asking for a kiss. And Carlos had let him.

Kendall snuggles closer to Carlos as he sleeps, smiling when Carlos's arms tighten around him and knowing that he has to leave before Carlos wakes

If he doesn't he'll never be able to leave, or end up a pathetic stalker that won't ever leave Carlos alone. And Carlos won't ever love him, he's a whore.

He allows himself a few more hours in Carlos's arms before he forces himself out of bed. He dresses silently and scribbles a short note, thanking Carlos for a great time before dropping a kiss on his forehead and leaving.

He made sure not to leave a number.


	3. Chapter 3

Short chapter this time. As before, chapters will go up once a week...ish, until this is complete. Enjoy!

* * *

Carlos awakes early the next morning, automatically reaching for Kendall and frowning when his arm falls on empty space.

It jolts him awake, and when he sees a note on his dresser his heart goes cold.

And really, it shouldn't bother him, that Kendall left in the middle of the night, but it does.

There's no number on the note. Just a thank you for a nice night and Carlos flips the note over, just in case. Nothing.

He has to find Kendall. It's stupid, and Kendall obviously didn't feel anything for him or he would have stayed until the morning but Carlos knows if he doesn't at least try he'll regret it.

He dresses and heads downstairs to the kitchen, where Logan and James are eating breakfast and making lovesick puppy gazes at each other again.

"Get any last night?" James teases as Carlos pours himself coffee. Carlos reaches over to smack him.

"No. He stayed here part of the night and was gone by the time I woke up."

"That's probably good, he could have had an STD," Logan says offhandedly, and Carlos has an urge to deck him.

"Actually, I wanted to talk to you about him," Carlos says, knowing how he's going to sound but he doesn't care, he needs to get closure, or something. "Where'd you find him, again?"

Logan eyes him suspiciously.

"Why?"

"He left something of his in my room, I wanted to return it," Carlos lies, hoping it's convincing. Logan's face shows him it isn't.

"What's the real reason?"

"Just tell me," Carlos says exasperatedly. "Please."

"Don't go getting hung up on this guy, Carlos," Logan warns, a strange look in his eye. "He's just a hooker, if he was a good date it was probably all an act. If you want a boyfriend go find a real guy to date, you don't need something like that."

At that Carlos turns and leaves, feeling his blood boil; if he'd responded it probably would have been with his fist. He doesn't understand Logan's mentality - Kendall's a person, just because he does what he does doesn't mean he was faking, or not good enough to be a real boyfriend.

But Logan hit right on Carlos's biggest problem with this - he has no idea if Kendall was acting or not.

He goes back up to his room and tries to calm down. Even if Kendall was faking Carlos wants to know, and he knows damn well he's not going to be able to get any work done with how he's feeling, so he calls his restaurant's manager and tells her he'll be out of the office for the day.

Once he's done that he sits down at his desk and opens his laptop and just stares at it. He has no idea how to track Kendall down.

Kendall might not even be his real name. Don't hookers usually use fake ones?

Carlos slams his laptop closed with a frustrated growl and grabs his car keys. He doesn't know where he's going, but he knows he doesn't want to stay here.

Logan corners him on the way out, obviously he's realized how pissed off Carlos is. He grabs Carlos before he can get out the door, his face filled with concern.

"What's wrong?"

Carlos shrugs his arm off as he tries to temper the urge to snap - and he's not sure why he wants to.

"Nothing," he says, knowing Logan will see through it.

"Bullshit. I know that look, you're pissed off at me."

"No, just annoyed. What's the big deal if I look Kendall up?" Carlos asks, arching an eyebrow as Logan rolls his eyes.

"Because he's a hooker," Logan says, exasperation evident in his voice. "Look, I know you're lonely, but he was supposed to be a joke, you said you'd turn away a guy like that if he showed up. I told them when I got him that he probably wouldn't have to go with you.

Carlos finally snaps and punches Logan in the face.

"You piece of shit," he growls. "He's a person just like you and me, and yeah, maybe he was faking being awesome last night but maybe he wasn't, and I want to find out. But fuck you, I can't even stand to look at you right now." With that he turns and leaves and he _knows_ he's overreacting but Logan's attitude doesn't sit right with him.

Carlos wonders if he'd have had the same reaction if Kendall hadn't been an amazing date. As he climbs into his car he thinks he probably would've agreed with Logan, although he thinks Logan's still being a little callous.

He ends up driving aimlessly for most of the day, coming home well after he knows Logan will have gone to sleep

The anger is gone. Carlos spent most of the day thinking about Logan and his bad attitude about Kendall, and knows in the morning he and Logan need to talk and work this out.

He falls into bed and wishes again that he wasn't alone.

* * *

The next few days are a veritable hell for Kendall. All he can think about is Carlos, and how much he regrets leaving that night. After a day he tries to find a way to contact Carlos, but he realizes that he doesn't know Carlos's last name, or the name of his restaurant or anything.

He takes that as a sign that it's not meant to be.

Work becomes his top priority now. His manager, Marla, approached him yesterday to talk about promoting him to a team lead among the other servers. Apparently it's unheard of for someone so new, but she also said that Kendall obviously has a knack for it and deserves it.

Kendall isn't sure he deserves anything, but Marla mentioned more money, so he'd agreed to take the position if the owner approved it. He's not stupid enough to turn down higher pay, and the job itself sounds like something he'd be good at.

Once he'd agreed to take the position Marla had called the owner, who Kendall still hasn't met - when Kendall had asked about it Marla had only said he was out on leave for a few days. She smiles at him when she comes back from the phone call and says the job is his, that the owner 'didn't even flinch.'

She then playfully warns him not to screw up. No pressure. He gets two days off after that, and the raise is enough that he can cut back on taking clients from the agency a bit.

He still takes one on his first day off, desperate to forget about Carlos. It doesn't work, but the sex is good enough.

As he showers that night he wonders if he'll ever feel clean again. He checks his phone before he goes to sleep and sees a text from the agency - Anderson wants him this Friday night. He's willing to pay three times Kendall's normal fee for it.

Kendall frowns to himself as he responds to the text, wishing he could afford to say no to something like that.

Soon, he tells himself as he falls asleep.


	4. Chapter 4

Thank you everyone for the amazing reviews!

* * *

Carlos ends up taking a few days vacation from work. He and Logan talked the morning after Carlos stormed out, and Carlos knows Logan thinks he has Carlos's best interests at heart when he says Carlos could do better than a hooker but the bottom line is that Carlos is an adult and can make his own decisions.

He spends the three days that he takes with his family, and it's nice, to be home again. He misses them.

It's almost a relief when Carlos finally goes back to the restaurant; it's Thursday by this point, he's never been away so long before. His manager had called him Tuesday, asking if he could authorize promoting one of the new servers, whose name he didn't catch, to a team lead. He'd immediately done so - she's never made a bad call yet, he trusts her judgement.

It's nice, he muses as he walks through the front door, to have people he can depend on so thoroughly. He smiles and greets people as he walks through the restaurant, stopping by the servers station to check in.

He thinks he must have fallen and hit his head at some point, because Kendall is standing at the station talking to his manager.

Carlos blinks in disbelief and just stands there in shock, watching as Marla, his manager, goes over the duties of a team lead with Kendall.

Kendall's the one she'd asked for authorization to promote.

Carlos doesn't understand; it's been a week since his date with Kendall, he was sure he'd never see him again. Marla looks up and sees him after a moment and smiles brightly.

"Carlos, perfect! This is Kendall, the server I talked to you about a few days ago, I want you to finally have a chance to see him in action." She motions to Kendall, her smile widening. "I don't think you've met yet, have you?"

Kendall looks up at Marla's words and Carlos sees all the color drain from his face.

"Sort of," Carlos says weakly. "Kendall, can you come with me to my office, please?"

Kendall nods silently and follows Carlos out of the main dining room and into his office, and Carlos can see that he's shaking once the door is closed and Carlos turns to survey him.

"I don't blame you for firing me," Kendall says softly, holding out the clipboard he has with his notes on it. Carlos stares at him in disbelief.

"You work here?" he finally manages, and Kendall nods, looking confused.

"I have for almost two weeks now."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Carlos's brain feels stuck, he knows all this fits together somehow but he can't reconcile it in his head. Kendall arches an eyebrow.

"I didn't know this was your restaurant."

Carlos supposes that makes sense, when he thinks about it; he never actually gave Kendall the name of his restaurant. His mouth opens to respond before snapping shut and he opts to just stare again.

"Oh," he finally manages. Kendall's watching him, looking more and more confused as Carlos just stares at him.

"So I am fired, right?" Kendall asks hesitantly. It snaps Carlos out of his reverie.

"What? No, of course not. Why would you be fired?"

"I'm sure you don't want a hooker working for you." The tone of Kendall's voice is so self loathing it breaks Carlos's heart.

"Do you like the job?" he asks, and Kendall nods hesitantly. "You're happy here?" Another nod.

"Why would I fire you, then?" Carlos asks, feeling slightly exasperated, but he gets it.

"I don't know. Why wouldn't you?"

It's the self loathing that makes Carlos snap. He crosses the distance between himself and Kendall and kisses him hard - he knows it's a bad idea, Kendall probably doesn't feel a thing for him and then he realizes that _Kendall is kissing him back_.

"So…I'm not fired?" Kendall asks softly once Carlos pulls back, his arms winding around Carlos's waist to keep him close. Carlos laughs and shakes his head.

"How did I not know you worked for me?" Carlos asks in disbelief. "I know everyone."

"I started a few days before our-" Kendall's voice catches and he flushes.

"Date," Carlos supplies, his own arms winding around Kendall.

"Date," Kendall agrees softly. "I must have just missed you, but Marla said you were out most of this week, and I was off the last two days."

Carlos supposes that makes sense.

"I was, I took a few personal days when I realized I had no way of finding you," Carlos said softly. Kendall lets out a noise and steps back to look at Carlos.

"Did you really?" he asks, disbelief written on his face. Carlos nods.

"Yeah. I don't know what it was about you that night but…I was, like, devastated when I woke up and you weren't there. Why didn't you leave me a way to contact you?"

Carlos frowns when he sees something in Kendall close off.

"Just…didn't seem worth it. I figured you were only as nice as you were because you felt sorry for me."

"Not at all. I just liked you. It took me by surprise, but that hasn't changed." When Kendall flushes again Carlos smiles.

"Look, let me let you get back to work," he says, resisting the urge to kiss Kendall again. "What time are you finished?"

"Seven," Kendall says, looking like he can't believe what's happening. "Why?" Carlos smiles wider.

"I'll meet you at the end of your shift, then. Will you have dinner with me tonight?" he asks, feeling his heart swell when Kendall nods, that shy look back.

"Yeah, okay. I'd like that."

"Good. Now go, or Marla will come in here and choke me for keeping you out of the dining room, she couldn't stop singing your praises the other day." Carlos leans in for another kiss when Kendall laughs, a true smile gracing his face.

Carlos thinks he's beautiful.

"Okay, okay. I'll see you at seven." When Kendall moves to leave Carlos grabs him by the arm to stop him.

"Don't run off on me again," he requests softly. "Please. Whatever you think wasn't worth it…just give me dinner tonight. That's all I'm asking for."

"I won't," Kendall says, and Carlos believes him. Once Kendall's gone he sits down at his desk and rubs a hand over his face, wondering how the hell this happened.

He's not complaining, though.

* * *

Kendall feels dazed as he walks back to the dining room and to Marla - he can't believe what just happened. He brushes off Marla's questions and gets to work, falling easily into the role of what Marla said is basically a manager.

There's a part of him that wants to run, though. He's never felt anything like he does with Carlos, but he was able to deal with it because he'd known they'd never see each other again.

Apparently the universe had other plans.

He sees Carlos standing and talking to Marla as he passes a few times but doesn't allow himself to worry about what they might be saying. He has other things to concern himself with.

Like the assholes at table ten that just made their server cry from being so rude to her. She motions him over as he passes with a tray of drinks, and he hands the tray off to another server so the guests don't have to wait.

"What happened?" he asks, handing Anna a napkin so she can wipe her eyes.

"They just got to me," Anna sighs, crumpling up the napkin angrily. "I know the customer is always right and all that shit, but just because the kitchen overcooked his steak doesn't mean he has to call me stupid and tell me I'm incompetent and should be fired."

"What'd you tell him?" Kendall asks, seeing Carlos and Marla walk within earshot out of the corner of his eye.

"They asked for a manager, demanded someone "'competent'-" she makes air quotes, "-get them their food. I told him I'd get someone."

Kendall sighs and rubs a hand over his face. He hates people some days.

"You're having their food remade, right?"

"Yeah, of course." Anna nods and tosses the napkin in a nearby garbage. "That wasn't good enough, he said they deserve a free meal."

"I'll go talk to them," Kendall says, reaching out to squeeze her shoulder, knowing Carlos and Marla are watching to see how he handles this. "Go check with the kitchen and get his food as soon as you can."

Anna shoots him a grateful smile and heads to the kitchen, and Kendall turns to head to the table. The guy glares at him as he walks up.

"I asked for a manager," he sneers, and Kendall fights the urge to punch him.

"I'm the manager on duty," he says smoothly. "I understand there was an issue with your plate, I have another being brought out in just a few minutes, and I'd like to apologize-"

"I don't want your apology, I want a server that's competent," the guy spits, cutting Kendall off, and Kendall glances over to see Carlos and Marla ready to step in if Kendall needs it. He takes a deep breath before responding.

"Unfortunately people do make mistakes," he begins, holding up a hand when asshole tries to interrupt him again, "I'll make sure the steak is removed from your bill, but we aren't able to hold the servers accountable for how well done the steaks are since it isn't a visible error. That's the responsibility of the kitchen, and I assure you that I'll be having a word with them as well."

Kendall represses the urge to let out a noise of triumph when asshole doesn't respond right away.

"I think our entire meal should be free," he finally says, and Kendall groans internally.

"Were there any problems with any of the other plates?" he asks.

"That's not the point. We've been loyal customers of this restaurant for the last year and come to expect a certain level of professionalism with the food," asshole retorts, and now Kendall wants to laugh.

"Unfortunately I'm only able to comp meals that were incorrect," he says, and asshole looks like he's about to blow, so Kendall takes a risk and continues, "but, as a thank you for your understanding with this I'll let you have any dessert free of charge as well. How does that sound?"

As asshole thinks it over Anna brings his new meal and asks him to cut the steak to ensure it's cooked properly. It is, and asshole looks at Kendall and nods.

"That's fine. Thank you."

Kendall has never been more aware of being watched than he is as he walks away from the table and over to Carlos and Marla.

"You can take the dessert out of my paycheck," he offers as they both survey him appraisingly, and Carlos shakes his head.

"I've never seen anyone handle that guy the way you did," Carlos says, and Kendall feels a tiny surge of pride. "He's been in here a few times before and is a dick to everyone if there's so much as a grain of rice out of place on his plate, you're the first person to actually calm him down."

"We think he's bipolar," Marla adds with a wicked grin, and Kendall chuckles softly. "You definitely deserved the promotion, Kendall, I'm proud of you."

"Thanks," Kendall says, feeling himself blush as Carlos beams at him.

"I'll see you at seven," Carlos says before winking at Kendall and walking back to the front of the restaurant with Marla, and Kendall feels his heart swell.

Seven can't come soon enough.


	5. Chapter 5

Carlos is seriously impressed with Kendall's response to the asshole guest; once Kendall's back to work he and Marla head to his office to go over what happened while he was gone, both of them confident Kendall will handle anything that might come up.

It seems like he didn't miss anything, which is good. He glances at the clock once Marla's gone over everything, wishing Kendall's shift was over.

He is definitely not counting down the minutes until seven. The fact that he knows there's seventy three left is just coincidence.

"So you and Kendall have history, huh?" Marla's voice penetrates Carlos's haze and she laughs as he turns to her in confusion.

"What do you mean?"

"You've been checking the clock every five minutes, Carlos," Marla teases, an understanding smile on her face. "The both of you looked like you'd seen a ghost after you walked in earlier. Eager to see him, are we?"

"Shut up." Carlos feels his face heat up, and Marla laughs.

"What happened?" she asks curiously. "He was white as a sheet when you pulled him into your office."

"He...we went on a date," Carlos starts, and Marla just arches an eyebrow; with as long as they've known each other there's not a lot he can hide from her - she's kind of like his second mom, he thinks. He sighs and continues, "Okay, fine, you win. Just- just don't judge him, okay?"

"As long as he makes you happy I'm not gonna judge him," Marla says. "Unless he's a drug dealer or something. Then I might a little."

Carlos laughs. This is why he likes Marla so much.

"He's..." Carlos trails off and feels his cheeks heat up in embarrassment again. "An, uh. Escort. Logan set me up with him for the convention last week and he came home with me and left in the middle of the night, and I don't know what it is about him but he isn't like anyone else I've ever met."

"A hooker?" Marla asks incredulously. "Carlos, are you sure that's a good idea?"

"No," Carlos says miserably. "But you don't hear him when he mentions it, Marla, like he hates himself for doing it. He doesn't do it because he wants to."

"He might _seem_ like he doesn't want to, but that could just be to make you feel sorry for him," Marla cautions. "Did you, uh. Sleep with him?"

One of these days Carlos will learn not to blush.

"Yes, but only sleeping. You know I'm not that kind of guy."

Marla lets out a hum as she ponders what Carlos said and looks at him critically.

"So you're meeting him after his shift?"

"Yeah." Carlos nods and sighs heavily. "You think it's a bad idea, don't you."

"It's just dinner," Marla reasons. "Honey, the whole world knows how lonely you are, I just want you to be careful with him. Dinner won't hurt anything. From what I see of him he's a great guy, and by the way he reacted to seeing you he clearly had no idea this was your place, so there's no reason for him to fake that."

"I love you," Carlos laughs weakly; Marla's one of the smartest people he's ever met, excepting Logan. "It's just dinner, I want to get to know him."

Marla just smiles at him.

"I'm gonna usurp your authority and let him leave now, then," she says. "Go have a good time with him."

"You're the best," Carlos laughs. "Allow me to go get him." Marla laughs and waves him off, and Carlos immediately makes his way to where Kendall's standing by one of the registers.

"Hey," he says, leaning against the wall as Kendall turns to smile at him. "Marla said you can go for the day, any chance I can convince you to come to dinner with me now?"

He smirks when Kendall flushes red.

"I think so," Kendall says, smiling wider. "Just let me finish up here?"

"You got it. I'll meet you by the host station," Carlos says, reaching out to squeeze Kendall's arm.

"Five minutes," Kendall says with a smile.

Carlos can't keep the grin off his own face as he walks back to the host station to wait for Kendall; he knows this might not end the way he'd like it to, but the fact that he has a chance is enough to give him hope.

Almost exactly five minutes later Kendall walks up to where Carlos is waiting. He's changed his shirt and greets Carlos with that shy smile, making Carlos's heart flutter.

"Hey." Carlos holds out a hand and Kendall takes it, squeezing gently.

"Hey. So where are we going?" Kendall asks as they walk outside.

"Wherever you want," Carlos replies. "We could eat here, but I doubt you'd want to do that after you spent all day working."

"I don't mind, actually," Kendall says. "I've never actually eaten here, just sampled the dishes."

"Do you want to?" Carlos asks curiously, stopping them from walking any farther, and Kendall shrugs.

"Sure, that sounds good."

"Then we're going the wrong way." Carlos steers them back inside and exchanges a few words with Stephanie, the hostess, and a few minutes later Carlos is leading Kendall into a private dining room.

"Trying to impress me?" Kendall teases as Carlos pulls out his chair, but Carlos can see he's enjoying it.

"Is it working?" Carlos retorts as he takes his own seat.

"Maybe," Kendall concedes with an impish grin. Carlos laughs and reaches across the table to take his hand and squeeze it.

"So tell me about yourself," he requests with a smile, but the smile dies as he watches Kendall shut down again.

"I'm not that interesting."

"Maybe not to you. C'mon, what can you tell me that'll make me judge you? I want to know you." Carlos smiles reassuringly at Kendall and sees the wall crack a tiny bit as Kendall sighs in defeat.

"I was born in Minnesota," he begins, "I moved out here a few years ago for school."

"What school?" Carlos asks encouragingly.

"UCLA," Kendall responds, and he won't meet Carlos's eyes.

"What year did you graduate?" Carlos prompts, frowning when he sees Kendall's face fall.

"I didn't," he says softly, and Carlos wonders why the fuck he has foot in mouth syndrome around this guy.

"I'm sorry," he says lamely. "Can I ask why?"

Kendall looks up at him sadly, and Carlos feels his heart break.

"You can't possibly care."

"Would I ask otherwise?" The challenge is gentle, Carlos wants so badly to be able to wipe the pain from Kendall's face.

"I guess not. I went there on a hockey scholarship, full ride," Kendall begins, "I had an accident a few years ago, and it killed my knees. I can't play anymore, and because I couldn't keep my place on the team my scholarship got yanked. I dropped out pretty soon after that."

"Shit," Carlos breathes softly. "I- Kendall, I'm so sorry."

"It is what it is," Kendall says with a shrug, falling silent as Marla comes in to take their order. Once she's gone Kendall just stares at him, looking for all the world like a lost puppy.

"Is-" Carlos breaks off, wondering if Kendall will think he's prying, "-is there any way you could ever play again?"

"Yeah, surgery I can't afford," Kendall says, bitterness evident in his voice. Carlos is silent, not sure what to say.

"I'm sorry," he finally says. "I just ruined our nice time."

"No, I did, I'm sorry." Kendall sighs. "I need to get over it."

"That's not something that's easy to get over, though," Carlos says gently. "I'd still be upset over it too, but at least you weren't paralyzed or anything."

"That'd be better than where I am now," Kendall says, anger and hurt and Carlos hates the pain he hears, "I'm twenty three and working a shit job, no offense, and in my spare time I'm a prostitute. I've got it fucking _made_."

"Kendall," Carlos begins, getting up and walking around the table when he sees tears in Kendall's eyes.

"Do you have any idea how much I wish that accident had killed me some days?" Kendall whispers, and Carlos grabs a chair and pulls it up next to Kendall's. "When my mom found out I'd started hooking she practically disowned me, my girlfriend dumped me when I dropped out of college, I have no one."

"That's not true," Carlos says firmly, taking Kendall's hands in his own. "You have me, Kendall. Anything I can do to help you, I want to do it. And before you say I'm doing it because I feel sorry for you, I'm not."

"Yeah, okay," Kendall snorts. "How can you not?"

"Well, okay. I do," Carlos concedes. "No one should have to go through what you did. But I want to be there for you because I like you, and I think you deserve better than what you have."

"Pity," Kendall insists, and Carlos lets out an exasperated noise before yanking Kendall in to kiss him hard.

"If I pitied you I wouldn't want to kiss you," he murmurs against Kendall's mouth. He feels Kendall sigh more than he hears it.

"You might. I'm a hooker, remember? It's all I'm good for."

"Not true," Carlos responds as he pulls back. "Can I ask you how you uh, got into that?"

"Sure, why not," Kendall says blandly. "After I dropped out of UCLA I got a job at a diner nearby that was in the wrong kind of neighborhood. I got stopped by a guy that works for my agency - he tried to pick me up, but then basically recruited me. I couldn't turn down that kind of money, I was days away from living on the street." He looks at Carlos sadly.

"You must think I'm really pathetic."

Carlos shakes his head and leans closer to Kendall with a smile.

"I'm actually glad you did, as bad as it sounds."

Kendall arches an eyebrow.

"It brought you to me," Carlos says simply. "I've never felt anything like what I do when I'm with you."

"I'm not worth it," Kendall whispers.

"You are."

"I'm not," Kendall says stubbornly, and Carlos rolls his eyes.

"Let me prove it to you. Give me a chance," Carlos all but pleads. "Spend tomorrow with me?"

"Carlos," Kendall whispers, his eyes squeezing closed.

"Please," Carlos whispers back. "Just tomorrow. Spend tomorrow night and just be with me. If you want to leave Saturday you can, I won't stop you."

"I can't tomorrow night," Kendall says softly. "I have a client."

"Cancel," Carlos begs. "I'll double whatever they're paying you if you want."

Carlos sees the hesitation on Kendall's face when his eyes open.

"I don't want you to have to pay me."

"I don't want to," Carlos responds. "Don't take that wrong, but I want you, not you working."

"I know." Kendall sighs heavily and fixes Carlos with a searching gaze. "My client won't be happy."

"I don't care," Carlos says firmly. "Who would you be happier with?"

"You."

"Then just give me tomorrow. Please."

Kendall is silent for a long time before answering.

"I-," he begins. "Carlos, I need the money. I'll spend tomorrow with you until I have to leave, but I can't afford to not take the money, and I won't take yours."

Carlos feels his heart break a little, but he thinks he gets it; he's pushing really hard.

"Come back to me after?"

"If he doesn't want me to spend the night," Kendall concedes.

Carlos figures this is as good as he's going to get.

"Okay. You think you'll be able to let me know what he wants?" he asks, feeling sort of awkward discussing Kendall's "other job."

"I promise," Kendall says, not meeting Carlos's eyes as he asks, "Do you think we could change the subject?"

"Of course," Carlos says, leaning in to kiss Kendall gently. "It means a lot that you opened up to me, though."

"Yeah," Kendall says, and Carlos sighs to himself as Kendall closes up again. He gets it, but that doesn't make it less frustrating. Marla walks back in at that exact moment, and from the look on her face Carlos knows she heard Kendall's outburst but stayed away until he'd calmed down.

Carlos decides Marla's getting a raise. A fucking huge one.

She's silent as she sets their food down but shoots him a reassuring smile as she walks out. He turns to Kendall once she's gone and smiles hesitantly.

"Please tell me you still have an appetite."

Finally, Kendall laughs.

"Yeah, I guess I owe it to you to eat, huh?" he teases, taking a bite of his steak and letting out what Carlos thinks is an unfair sounding moan.

"This is amazing, Carlos, holy shit."

Carlos just stares. He thinks he might possibly be drooling, too.

"You're not a porn star too or something, are you?" he asks weakly, and Kendall fixes him with a strange look.

"No..." he says slowly. "Why?"

"That sound you just made," Carlos manages, and Kendall smirks at him. "You're insanely hot, Kendall."

"So I've been told." Kendall takes another bite and makes that same noise again.

"Tease," Carlos groans.

"Oh, sorry, did you want some?" Kendall holds a bite of his steak to Carlos's lips. "Best steak I've ever had."

"If you don't knock it off I won't be responsible for my actions." Carlos's voice wavers a little as he speaks, and Kendall laughs.

"Later," he says, voice filled with promise. "We have all day tomorrow."

Carlos smiles brightly, glad Kendall seems willing to give him a chance; he knows this still might not end up the way he wants it to, but after spending time with Kendall like this he's at least confident that Kendall's genuine.

As they fall into an easy conversation while they finish eating Carlos starts contemplating how to help Kendall out of his situation. Marla winks at him when she walks in to check on them, and Carlos smiles gratefully at her.

They're going to have a long talk later tonight.

* * *

Once Kendall is home that night he collapses on his bed and just lays there, thinking over his dinner with Carlos. His eyes stop seeing the ceiling as his mind goes back to the restaurant, to Carlos and all the pity in his face.

Kendall isn't totally sure why he broke down like that and kind of wishes he hadn't, but there's something about Carlos that worms its way past all his defenses and breaks them down. He doesn't understand it and isn't going to try.

No one has ever treated him the way Carlos does.

As he drifts asleep his mind supplies him with dreams of Carlos, of gentle kisses and strong arms around him and for the first time in a long time Kendall falls asleep with a smile on his face.


	6. Chapter 6

Warnings in this chapter for two things: excessive gross sappy fluff, and mildly graphic sex, of the BDSM variety. Thank you to everyone for your amazing reviews!

* * *

When Kendall awakes the next morning it's to a text from Carlos; they'd exchanged numbers the night before, and the sight of "good morning beautiful" on his phone brings a bright smile to his face.

Carlos is amazing.

Kendall showers and dresses quickly when he sees another text from Carlos saying he'll be by soon - since Kendall can't afford a car Carlos offered to chauffeur them for the day.

The smile doesn't leave Kendall's face as he responds to the text and goes to wait for Carlos outside his apartment building.

He's a little intimidated when Carlos drives up in a Mercedes, though. Carlos smiles and waves him over, leaning in for a kiss once Kendall's settled in the passenger seat.

"Don't let the car get to you," he says knowingly, and Kendall lets out a soft laugh.

"Was it that obvious?"

"Yeah." Carlos puts the car in gear and drives out, turning to grin at Kendall after a few moments.

"So, anything you want to do today?"

"Just be with you." Kendall shoots Carlos a smile, feeling his heart swell when Carlos smiles back widely.

"How about the beach?" Carlos suggests, reaching across the center console to take Kendall's hand as he drives.

"Whatever you want," Kendall says with a smile, squeezing Carlos's hand. Carlos shakes his head and chuckles.

"It's not just about me, babe, it's about you too."

Kendall knows he could get used to being with Carlos like this. Still, he isn't quite comfortable telling Carlos what they should do; he's lucky enough that Carlos even wants to spend time with him, he can just go along for the ride.

"The beach sounds good," he says when Carlos looks at him expectantly. "Are we swimming, then? I didn't bring anything."

"Yeah, but I took care of it, I think an extra pair of my trunks should fit you fine."

Kendall kind of feels like "Carlos is amazing" is going to become his new mental mantra.

"You're too good to me," he says, feeling himself blush, and Carlos just laughs.

"Never."

"Yes," Kendall insists, mostly playfully but he sort of wonders what he did to deserve this. Carlos shakes his head and pulls Kendall's hand up to his lips to kiss it, and Kendall can feel his smile against the back of his hand.

It's sort of surreal as Carlos parks the car at a members only beach. He motions to Kendall to stay put and rushes around the car to open his door with a grin.

"Shall we?" His hand is extended and he helps Kendall out of the car and Kendall wonders for a brief moment if Carlos is real.

He brought a picnic, too. He makes Kendall stand and wait as he lays out blankets and sets out food and Kendall can't help but smile at him.

"So what do you want? I brought roast chicken, a couple burgers and like, potato salad and stuff." Carlos hands Kendall a plate and settles down next to him once he's seated.

"How long did this take you?" Kendall asks incredulously, and Carlos shrugs.

"Not that long, it's no big deal."

"You're amazing," Kendall says, voice soft but he smiles as Carlos's face lights up and turns red all at once.

"You deserve it," he retorts, and now it's Kendall's turn to blush.

"If you say so."

Carlos just smiles as they start eating, and once they're finished he moves behind Kendall, pulling Kendall into his lap and kissing the back of his neck.

"You're supposed to wait an hour to swim after you eat," he murmurs in Kendall's ear, and it's so silly and Carlos that Kendall can't help but burst out laughing.

"You're a cuddler, aren't you."

"You bet." Another kiss is pressed to the back of Kendall's neck. "I love holding you like this."

Kendall hums in contentment and relaxes back against Carlos, his eyes falling shut as they just sit on the beach.

Kendall falls asleep for a little while, blinking awake to Carlos's hands threading through his hair. He's moved so his head is in Carlos's lap, Carlos's hands steady as they massage his scalp.

"Hi, beautiful," Carlos murmurs with a smile as he looks down at Kendall. "Ready for a swim?"

Kendall blushes again and turns to bury his face against Carlos's thigh, making him laugh.

"C'mon, babe, come swimming with me."

"Okay, okay." Kendall rolls back over and smiles up at Carlos.

He doesn't think he's ever been this happy.

They head to a beach house to change, Carlos's eyes raking over Kendall appreciatively when he steps out.

"Gorgeous," he says, pulling Kendall into a gentle kiss when he's close enough. Kendall shoves at him gently, embarrassed but still loving the affection.

"Shut up, I am not."

"Yeah, you are," Carlos counters, his eyes sparkling. "My best friend's boyfriend is a supermodel, I know gorgeous."

"Whatever," Kendall says with a laugh as Carlos takes his hand and laces their fingers together as they walk.

They swim out into the ocean until they hit a sandbar, shallow enough for Kendall to stand comfortably, the water just reaching his shoulders. He slides his arms around Carlos and lifts him up, smiling when Carlos's legs wrap around his waist.

"Hi, beautiful," Carlos says with a smile. Kendall shakes his head but smiles back - he thinks that's Carlos's new favorite phrase. Carlos leans in and kisses him, hands threading into Kendall's hair to hold him in place and seriously, this has to be the best thing ever, kissing Carlos in the ocean like this.

By the time they break apart it's late in the afternoon and Kendall's lips are numb but he's happy, happier than he's ever been with someone before.

Carlos swims back to shore then and Kendall follows, eyes widening as Carlos rents them surfboards and proceeds to teach Kendall.

He's beyond terrible. Carlos can't stop laughing as he wipes out time after time, and once Kendall manages to catch a wave and ride it without wiping out he announces he's quitting while he's ahead.

Carlos just shakes his head and catches his own wave back, shooting Kendall a smug grin once he's close enough.

They swim back to shore and dry off and change, and Kendall feels like he's in a dream, watching as Carlos pulls his shirt on and holds a hand out to Kendall.

"Ready for dinner?"

"Depends on what it is," Kendall teases, and Carlos shoves him playfully.

"There's a little diner right near here, I thought we could do that."

"That sounds perfect." Kendall takes Carlos's hand again as they walk, falling silent and wondering at how he managed to get so lucky, wondering if maybe this didn't all happen for a reason to bring him to Carlos, because if Kendall had stayed in school he never would've considered being with a guy. And he definitely wouldn't have met Carlos.

The thought is enough to make Kendall pull Carlos close and wrap an arm around him, smiling when Carlos's arm winds around his waist, too.

Dinner is over far too soon, and as they climb into Carlos's car Carlos turns to fix him with a pleading look, because Kendall's life just came crashing back down on them and the magic of the entire day is gone.

"Don't go," is all he says. Kendall wishes he didn't have to, but he has rent and tuition due next week and his paycheck won't cover it.

"I'm sorry," he whispers. Carlos sighs like he was expecting Kendall's answer, but he still smiles.

"Just let me know if I can see you tonight."

"I will." Kendall nods in agreement and is silent as Carlos drives them home. When they are Kendall arranges for someone from the agency to pick him up to take him to Anderson's.

He can't quite look Carlos in the eye as they say goodbye, instead kissing him hard and hoping what he can't say gets across that way.

Kendall hates himself as he climbs into the car that's there for him. As they drive he starts mentally checking out, like he always does every time he goes to see a client.

He never misses the leer Anderson greets him with, though.

The door shuts, the lock turns. Kendall always feels trapped.

He hates kissing. Anderson insists, says Kendall's mouth is too pretty not to.

As Anderson strips him Kendall retreats father into his mind. If he doesn't think, it's easier.

He's forced into his knees and Anderson shoves his dick into Kendall's mouth; Kendall responds automatically, pliant and unresisting as he brings Anderson off.

Of course that's not enough. Kendall registers Anderson calling him a whore, that he's worthless and only good for sucking dick.

Which totally explains why Anderson spins him around and pushes him onto his hands and knees. Kendall wants to laugh at him.

It's almost like acting, he muses as Anderson blindfolds him and trails a hand down his back - he's playing the part of an eager participant, someone that enjoys begging to get fucked.

Anderson loves when Kendall begs. He does everything he can to humiliate Kendall every time Kendall is there, this is one of his favorite ways.

The sex doesn't last long. Anderson gets off way too easily from this, but Kendall's always felt that was a good thing.

He hears Anderson laugh darkly as he shoots all over Kendall's back, and Kendall snaps back to himself long enough to be disgusted.

For a few minutes there is only silence.

Then something cool and hard trails over Kendall's back and down. He flinches, but isn't surprised when it's pushed into him, teasing.

Fucking sick bastard.

Kendall still plays his part well, responding exactly the way Anderson loves most, breathing an internal sigh of relief when whatever it is is pulled free.

The next thing he registers is a searing pain across his back, and he cries out.

The son of a bitch has a whip. That most have been what was just inside him.

Kendall's response is immediate. He tears the blindfold off and sits back, turning to see Anderson smiling evilly at him.

"Don't you like my new toy?"

"You know damn well that's not something I allow," Kendall growls, and Anderson shakes his head.

"I paid you, you do what I want."

"No," Kendall says firmly. Anderson shakes his head again.

"Get back on your knees, you worthless piece of shit." He brandishes the whip, grabbing Kendall by the arm and yanking him close. Kendall can smell booze on his breath.

"The whip stops." Kendall's voice is firm, brooking no argument.

"Fine." Anderson shoves Kendall back down to the floor. "Turn around."

Kendall knows he shouldn't have trusted Anderson - as soon as he does Anderson whips him again, hard enough to rip a scream from him.

He's had enough. He stands and turns to glare at Anderson. The pain in his back is almost unbearable.

"Enough. I'm leaving."

"No," Anderson growls, grabbing for Kendall, and Kendall snaps. He punches Anderson hard enough to knock him flat on his back.

"Go to hell," Kendall growls, smiling grimly when he sees that Anderson is unconscious. He dresses quickly, ignoring the pain as he tries to stave off the tears that are threatening to break free from it and leaves.

He runs from Anderson's place as fast as he can, desperate and alone because the agency wasn't planning on picking him up until the morning. He doesn't know where he's going, all he knows is he has to get as far away as possible right now.


	7. Chapter 7

This is officially finished, guys - I wrote the last bit tonight. This is **not the final chapter, though! We're only halfway there. ;)** The final word count is 40,331. There's still a lot left to go, and thank you to everyone who continues to review and love this!

* * *

_A watched pot never boils_. Carlos's mother's words echo in Carlos's head as he checks his phone for what's probably the thousandth time since Kendall left.

He hates this. Hates knowing Kendall's off with some stranger having sex, that someone else is touching him and kissing him. It's enough to make Carlos's blood boil.

Relax, he tells himself. Kendall promised that he'd let Carlos know if his client wanted him to stay the night, said that if Carlos didn't hear from him by nine it meant he was staying.

It's eight fifty. Carlos glares at his phone and wills a text or call or _something_ to happen. Nothing.

His doorbell rings, and Carlos almost leaps out of his skin. He sighs as he gets up and makes his way to the door, his breath leaving him when he sees Kendall outside.

He's about to smile and pull Kendall into a kiss when he registers Kendall's expression.

Something's wrong.

Kendall looks like he's about to lose it, so Carlos pulls him inside and into the den, silent until Kendall's seated on the couch.

"What happened?" Carlos asks softly, tipping Kendall's chin up so his gaze isn't in his lap. Kendall just shakes his head, so hard his whole body starts shaking.

Carlos pulls him close and holds him tight, feeling his heart break. As soon as he does Kendall lets out a hiss of pain and shoves Carlos away apologetically.

"I'm sorry. I..." Kendall's voice trails off, Carlos wonders what the hell happened.

"Are you hurt?" he finally asks. Kendall shrugs. Carlos tries not to sigh.

"Let me help you, Kendall. Please."

Carlos decides to take Kendall's silence as acquiescence and gently starts peeling his shirt off, frowning when he sees tiny speckles of red here and there.

"What the fuck," he breathes as he leans around Kendall, letting out a noise of horror when he sees the giant red welts along Kendall's back, obviously from a whip. Kendall has tears in his eyes again when Carlos sits back.

"Stupid motherfucker," Kendall says angrily, reaching up to scrub at his eyes. "Told me he'd stop, too, after the first one. I should've known better."

"Kendall," Carlos starts, but he can't find the right words. He pulls Kendall into his arms again, mindful of the welts and just holds him.

"Come on, we need to get those taken care of," he says after a moment. Kendall nods and allows Carlos to pull him up; he doesn't let go of Carlos's hand.

It breaks Carlos's heart.

"I need to shower," Kendall murmurs once they're in Carlos's bedroom.

"Whatever you need, just tell me." Carlos turns Kendall to inspect the welts and breathes a small sigh when he sees they're not that bad - the blood is from where Kendall's shirt rubbed the worst parts open - but he notices something else on Kendall's back that makes him frown.

"Yeah, he did," Kendall says after a moment - obviously he's figured out what Carlos is looking at. "He loves humiliating me."

"You know you're better than this, right?" Carlos asks as he helps Kendall out of his pants and leads him to the bathroom. Kendall laughs bitterly.

"Yeah, okay."

"Kendall," Carlos begins, and Kendall holds a hand up to stop him.

"I don't want to hear it now, please. I just want to shower and scrub his come off my back and try to forget that happened."

"Okay," Carlos says softly, frowning as Kendall bends down to remove his boxers and hisses in pain. "Let me."

Kendall nods and allows Carlos to help him out of his boxers and waits as he turns on the water.

"Is it too awkward if I help you?" Carlos looks up at Kendall and reaches up to cup his cheek. "I don't want you making that worse."

"Figures, the first time I get to see you naked I can't even enjoy it," Kendall says with a weak laugh. "That'd…be nice. Thank you."

Carlos smiles and brushes his thumb over Kendall's lips. He steps back and strips, stepping into the shower and holding out a hand for Kendall.

"Come here, beautiful."

The blush that colors Kendall's cheeks makes Carlos's heart flip over in his chest. Kendall steps into the shower and winces as the hot water hits his back, but then sighs in appreciation.

As he looks down at Carlos through wet hair plastered to his forehead Carlos leans up and kisses him, gentle and cautious. He can't help himself. Kendall responds eagerly, his hands coming up to cup Carlos's face and Carlos hasn't ever been kissed like this before, not by anyone.

"Let's get you cleaned up," Carlos murmurs after a moment, reaching around Kendall for the shampoo and Kendall just watches him, all disbelief and amusement as Carlos lathers his hair but his eyes slide shut in appreciation as Carlos massages his scalp.

"Can I ask you something?" Carlos murmurs as he maneuvers Kendall under the spray to rinse his hair. Kendall hums an assent and opens his eyes to survey Carlos curiously.

"Is this the first time this has happened?" Carlos reaches for a washcloth and begins gently cleaning Kendall off. Kendall shrugs and looks away.

"It's the first time he's ever…you know. Left marks. The rest of it…" Kendall trails off and shakes his head.

Carlos wants to throttle whoever did this to Kendall. He hopes he never finds out, because he doesn't think the end result would be pretty.

"You don't need to do this, Kendall." Carlos can hear the desperation in his voice, but he wants so badly for Kendall to stop this, to stop letting people objectify him and make him think he's less than a person.

"I can't not do it. I'm not good for anything else."

"You are. Kendall, you're worth so much more than this," Carlos insists, turning Kendall and gently cleaning his back. Kendall winces and lets out a soft noise of pain when Carlos rubs over the welts. "Sorry. But Kendall, I know I'm pushing with this but you don't have to keep working for that agency. You can move in here, I won't charge you rent or anything, just focus on going to school."

When Kendall's silent for a long time Carlos knows he pushed too far; he waits for Kendall to respond, knowing if he says anything he'll break Kendall's thought process.

"Carlos," Kendall begins, turning around to look at Carlos pleadingly. "Don't do this."

"Don't do what?"

Kendall's eyes squeeze shut as he whispers, "Make me fall for you more than I already have. Please."

"Why?" Carlos asks softly. "What's so wrong with falling for me?"

"Because everyone that's ever loved me has left me," Kendall says, voice barely loud enough for Carlos to hear so he leans in closer, reaches up to cup Kendall's face in his hands and shakes his head.

"I won't. I know you don't believe me and I know it's gonna take a lot for me to prove it to you, but I'm not going anywhere unless you tell me to go." Kendall doesn't respond so Carlos pushes a little harder, desperate now. "I want to be with you so much, Kendall, more than I've ever wanted to be with anyone before, but I don't want you to keep doing this to yourself. I don't want to be with someone that isn't faithful to me."

Kendall lets out a choked noise - Carlos is terrified he's gone too far and then Kendall suddenly breaks down and sobs, clinging to Carlos like if he lets go his whole world will drift away.

"Hey, easy," Carlos soothes, carefully sitting them down on the floor of the shower. It's awkward and not enough room but he settles Kendall into his lap and holds him, a hand carding through Kendall's wet hair as Kendall cries himself out. "Let it out, baby, it's okay."

Carlos isn't sure how long they sit there like that, hot water cascading down Kendall's back and Carlos's face, Carlos's hand steady in Kendall's hair and lips pressing reassuring kisses to wherever they can reach. When the water starts to run cold Kendall finally loosens his grip and looks up at Carlos, all wet hair and red rimmed eyes and he's still beautiful, so Carlos kisses him.

"I got you," he whispers against Kendall's lips. "No matter what, okay?"

"Yeah," Kendall says softly, and it's enough for now. Carlos shuts the water off and reaches for towels, drying Kendall before himself and grabbing ointment out of the medicine cabinet for Kendall's back, hoping it's the right thing to use. Kendall clings to his hand as Carlos leads him to the bedroom and sits him down on the bed.

"I got you," he repeats as he settles behind Kendall and carefully smoothes the ointment over the angry red welts, pressing a kiss between Kendall's shoulder blades once he's finished. "There. Does that feel any better?"

"Yeah." The same word sounds completely different now. "Thank you."

"You can thank me by cuddling with me all night," Carlos says with a half smirk as he settles back onto the bed and opens his arms for Kendall. There's no hesitation as Kendall makes himself comfortable in Carlos's arms, and Carlos smiles when Kendall leans up to kiss him.

"Thank you," he says again. "I don't know what I'd do without you, and I barely know you. That scares me."

"I got you." It's Carlos's new mantra as he wraps Kendall up securely in his arms and allows his eyes to close. He feels Kendall's hum of contentment and smiles again, wondering how he's going to help Kendall out of this situation.

* * *

Once Kendall has fallen asleep Carlos carefully climbs out of bed, grabbing sweatpants and heading downstairs. He heard Logan and James get in about a half hour ago, and he really needs their advice.

He only hopes that Logan can put his prejudices about Kendall aside.

They're on the couch watching tv when Carlos gets downstairs, a bowl of popcorn between them and Carlos represses the urge to gag as James feeds Logan a kernel.

"You two are disgusting, holy shit."

James looks up and laughs, motioning Carlos over with a leer.

"C'mere, you don't have to be left out, I'll feed you too."

"No thanks." Carlos plops down on the chair across from the couch, and Logan must see something on his face, that something is wrong.

"What happened?"

Carlos doesn't even know where to begin. James fixes him with a piercing gaze and sits forward, resting his elbows on his knees.

"Just talk, dude. Whatever it is, we're here to help."

"Exactly," Logan adds, sitting up as well. "How bad could it be?"

"Kendall's upstairs," Carlos finally blurts, bracing for Logan to start a tirade, but he just sighs in resignation.

"Why," he begins tiredly, "are you down here talking to us, then? Is he not good in bed or something?"

"Logan," James warns, "I already told you to stop judging him, don't make this worse on Carlos."

Logan just huffs out a breath and looks at Carlos, eyes searching his face.

"So Kendall's upstairs," James prompts after a moment. "What happened?"

Most awkward conversation ever.

"He, uh. Had a client tonight," Carlos starts, looking down at his lap - he knows he probably shouldn't be telling them this, but they're his best friends and if he can't lean on them then he has no one. He settles for being vague, knowing Logan at least will see through it, but at least he's not giving details. "They went too far, and he's hurt. And he's gonna hate me for telling you that and I wish I didn't need to, but I don't know what to do for him, he's got like, welts from whatever it was."

Carlos can see Logan's brain working, can see him putting the pieces together as he struggles to set aside his prejudices and just be a friend for Carlos.

"Use that ointment in the cabinet," he finally says, and Carlos can see the lecture coming, "but have you really thought about this, Carlos? Getting involved with someone that sells sex?"

"Nonstop," Carlos says, readying himself for the fight he's sure is coming. "I know you think I'm stupid, or that he's faking and is gonna scam me or whatever, but I thought this through and I can't not give it a chance. I've never felt anything like what I feel for him, Logan."

"He could still be playing you, being exactly what you've been dying for," Logan counters, and Carlos nods because the thought has crossed his mind too, that this could all be a farce.

"I know. I thought about that, don't act like you think I'm going into this blind."

Logan shakes his head and opens his mouth to speak, but Carlos holds up a hand to stop him.

"He works for me, Logan, he's been there for two weeks. I had no idea until I walked in two days ago and he was there, and the look on his face when he saw me...you can't fake that. And Marla says he's a fantastic guy, and since he had no idea it was my place he'd have no reason to fake that."

"He still could have known it was your restaurant," James argues without any heat, and Carlos nods; he thought about that too.

"Logan picked him, though, he didn't volunteer. So even if he did know by the time we went out and he lied about it Marla still saw who he really is, you know?"

Carlos resists the urge to crow in triumph when Logan reluctantly nods in agreement.

"Carlos...okay. I still don't know if I like my best friend trying to date a hooker, but he obviously means a lot to you and I'd be a shit best friend if I tried to fuck that up."

"Thank you," Carlos says sincerely, smiling gratefully at Logan. Logan smiles back and an idea hits Carlos.

"Hey. If Kendall had an accident like three years ago that fucked up his knees and made it so he can't play hockey what do you think happened to him?"

Logan's silent as he ponders it, finally answering with, "Most likely his ACL muscle tore. It supports your knee, if it's damaged it makes it hard to use your knees in sports like that."

"Is it fixable?" Carlos asks, suddenly desperate to be able to do this for Kendall. "He said his doctors said he needed surgery."

"Probably a patellar tendon graft." Logan nods and Carlos just stares blankly.

"It'll repair the muscles," Logan laughs before sobering. "Carlos, don't go paying for surgery for him or something."

"Why not? I have an amazing surgeon right here, couldn't you do it?"

"Technically yes but that's not the point. You don't know him."

"I know him enough. And I- Logan, fuck, I fell for him, okay?" Carlos sighs and runs a hand through his hair. "I didn't plan to but I did, and he deserves better than what he has and he can't afford the surgery on his own. I want to do this for him."

"He'd have to come in for an exam," Logan says with a resigned sigh.

"Okay." Carlos nods in understanding. "I'm not bringing it up right away, just...give him a chance, please. I know I barely know him but he isn't like anyone else I've ever met and want you to love him as much as I do."

"We will," James interjects with a smile. "I'll cancel our plans tomorrow, let's all hang out."

"That sounds awesome," Carlos says, smiling widely at James.

"Good. Now go back upstairs to him." James makes a shooing motion and laughs, ducking when Carlos gets up and swats at him.

"Going, going. Goodnight, guys."

"Night," they chorus, and Carlos rolls his eyes as he heads back up to Kendall.

He has a plan.

* * *

Kendall stirs as Carlos climbs back into bed, blinking up at him sleepily and cuddling close once Carlos is settled.

"Where'd you go?" he murmurs, and Carlos can't help but smile. He drops a kiss on Kendall's forehead.

"Went to talk to James and Logan. We're gonna hang out with them tomorrow."

At that Kendall sits up and looks at Carlos with wide eyes.

"We are?" he asks, and Carlos kisses him to soothe him.

"They'll love you, relax."

Kendall bites his lip as Carlos pulls away and Carlos cards a hand through his hair.

"Why are you so nervous?"

"Just...I don't want them to judge me. Or you because of me."

"Kendall." Carlos reaches out to cup Kendall's cheek. "They're not going to. And I care about you, if they want to judge you that's their problem, but I don't. Relax, babe, please. It's gonna be okay."

Kendall seems to relax at Carlos's touch; his eyes slide closed and he all but nuzzles into Carlos's hand.

"Okay. What are we doing?"

"Not sure," Carlos says with a shrug. "James apparently had plans for them but he said he's gonna cancel, I'm guessing he'll come up with something."

Kendall opens his eyes to smile at Carlos gratefully.

"Okay," he says again. "And thank you, for everything. I don't know what I'd do without you."

Carlos smiles back and pulls Kendall into a kiss and murmurs, "You'd be lost, of course. Now c'mon, I want you to get your rest, beautiful."

Kendall doesn't say anything, just cuddles up to Carlos's side and Carlos can't keep the smile off his face as Kendall exhales a soft sigh of contentment. He allows his own eyes to close, hoping tomorrow doesn't end in disaster. He knows Logan's going to have a talk with Kendall.


	8. Chapter 8

So I'm a little late on this, sorry! Work ate my life for the past few days - I made up for it with a chapter that's a bit longer. Enjoy!

* * *

Kendall awakes early the next morning - Carlos is still asleep, so Kendall takes advantage of it and just watches him sleep, thinking about how lucky he is.

He's beyond nervous about today. Normally people don't intimidate him, they can't with what he does in his spare time, but these are Carlos's best friends and if they don't like him Carlos might leave him.

Kendall doesn't know what he'd do without Carlos. The thought terrifies him.

As he watches Carlos sleep Kendall thinks about his life, thinks about what Carlos said about leaving the agency.

He wants to, so badly. He never wanted to start there.

He remembers when he had that accident, waking up in the hospital and being told he was lucky he'd be able to walk again.

He'd woken up to see his girlfriend, Jenna, sitting next to his bed with tears in her eyes. She'd told him she was scared he wasn't ever going to wake up.

Kendall finds it funny that within a month she'd dumped him. When the scholarship association had contacted him two weeks after the accident to tell him that his scholarship was being discontinued at the end of the school year due to non participation in hockey he'd immediately called Jenna in a panic.

He tried appealing the association's decision, but since Kendall couldn't tell them when he'd be able to play again and there were new players on the team that were eligible they'd been firm. They'd told him that the university's insurance would help cover his surgery, but even with that Kendall would've had a hard time affording it - and by that point he was so disheartened he declined out of spite.

Jenna had screamed at him for an hour straight when he told her what he'd decided.

Stupid bitch, Kendall thinks. She'd eventually decided she supported him - until she realized that he'd have to drop out. It was three weeks before the end of the year.

She left him right then, saying she didn't want to be with someone that wasn't doing anything with his life. He'd been devastated.

He knows that ultimately it was a good thing, but it'd hurt a lot then. Once Jenna dumped him he'd called his mom, who immediately offered for him to move back home, but also suggested getting a job to help pay for school, since she couldn't afford to help him.

It had taken him awhile to find one, since he'd never worked while he was in high school and had chosen not to in college because the scholarship paid for everything he had almost no work experience, which meant he was at the bottom of the list at every place he applied. Finally he started applying anywhere he could just to have some kind of income.

He'll never forget walking home that first night, when he'd been stopped by a hooker on the corner. It was after midnight, and the guy, Derek, was standing on the corner, the epitome of a hooker stereotype.

_"Hey gorgeous."_

_Kendall turned in surprise at the guy; he'd been hoping to ignore him. He rolled his eyes to himself and kept walking, hoping the guy would leave him alone. _

_"Hey, gorgeous, don't be like that." The guy caught up with him and Kendall stopped, turning to glare at him. _

_"I don't have any money," he said in exasperation. "I don't really do the prostitute thing anyway, sorry."_

_The guy looked Kendall over again, completely undeterred. _

_"How about we make you some money, then?"_

_"No thanks." Kendall glared at the guy. "I'm not a whore."_

_"It's not just that, gorgeous, you can just date people."_

_Kendall stopped despite himself; dating people wouldn't be _too_ bad. It wasn't his first choice of activity by far, but his landlord had told him that morning that if his rent wasn't paid in three days he'd be evicted. He had nowhere else to go. _

_"No sex?" he asked, and the guy nodded in agreement. _

_"Not if you don't want. Just tell them up front, you know? They'll give you clients that don't wanna fuck."_

_Kendall was torn. He needed the money, maybe he could just go on a few dates with some rich lonely women and get enough to cover his rent and then be done. _

_The thought disgusted him, but the money was _so_ appealing. His indecision must have shown on his face, because the guy grinned at him. _

_"Look, I can quit for the night, it's slow anyway. Why don't you just come back with me and talk to us and see what you think? No one's gonna force you."_

_Kendall was silent for a long time, warring with himself in his head before sighing. Talking to the people couldn't hurt. _

_"Fine, take me there."_

The rest is history, Kendall thinks. He'd talked to the people that ran the place and agreed to go on a few dates, but soon the women he dated had gotten so insistent on sex, telling him how gorgeous he was and that it was such a shame that he didn't have sex that he'd fucked them just to shut them up.

He'd been disgusted with himself, but it was just sex, he'd reasoned. No different than sleeping around in college. By that point he wasn't really able to stop, he'd started using the extra money to start back up at UCLA. He had to go to school.

Eventually the agency had asked him to take dates with men, too, and at that point Kendall had only sighed in resignation and agreed; what was the difference between dating a woman and dating a man? He wasn't ever going to have sex with one.

Sometimes Kendall wondered what happened to his morals; the third guy he'd escorted somewhere had offered him a thousand dollars in exchange for being able to fuck him. Kendall had refused for an hour straight before the guy tried doubling it, grumbling that Kendall had better be worth it. At that point Kendall had given in, the money finally swaying him, with the stipulation that his client take it slow.

His client had been gentle and sweet once he found out Kendall hadn't ever bottomed before, taking his time and actually putting effort into making sure Kendall enjoyed it. It was the best sex Kendall had ever had.

Once he accepted his bisexuality he'd taken dates indiscriminately, but as infrequently as he could - he still hated it.

"Hi, beautiful. What're you thinking about so hard?"

Carlos's voice snaps Kendall out of his reverie and he smiles and leans down for a kiss.

"Just thinking about how I ended up here. And watching you sleep."

Carlos laughs; it's the best sound in the world to Kendall.

"Creepy," he teases. "You ready for today, beautiful?"

"Not even a little," Kendall laughs. "But let's go anyway."

They climb out of bed and Carlos helps Kendall in the shower again, which he doesn't really need anymore but it's nice to be taken care of. And it comes with the added benefit of Carlos naked, so really, he's not going to complain.

Once they're dressed and downstairs Carlos makes them breakfast, making Kendall sit while he cooks. Kendall can't keep the smile off his face, although he feels nerves hit him when James and Logan walk in.

"What are you making?" the guy Kendall recognizes as James asks with a grin, and Kendall watches as Carlos swats at him, a smile tugging at his lips. Logan sits down across from Kendall and gives him a hesitant smile.

"Morning, dude. You sleep okay?"

Kendall nods, feeling incredibly awkward as Carlos sets a plate down in front of him and kisses his cheek.

"Right, you haven't officially met anyone yet," Carlos says with a laugh, turning to grab three more plates and set them on the table. He pulls out a chair next to Kendall and sits down, motioning vaguely between them. "James and Logan. Guys, this is Kendall."

"Nice to meet you," James says with a smile before digging into his breakfast.

"You too," Kendall says, relaxing a little when Carlos's hand settles on his knee and squeezes.

"So I was thinking," James says through a mouthful of food, "that we could go go-karting today. What do you guys think?"

"I think you need to chew your food before speaking," Logan says, making a face as James grins at him, chewed food showing at the corners of his mouth. "You're disgusting, babe. But yes, that sounds fun."

"We could go hiking too," Carlos suggests, squeezing Kendall's knee again, "like, Runyon Canyon or something." He turns to Kendall with a soft smile.

"That sound okay?"

Kendall nods uncomfortably; he's the guest here, it's not his place to make decisions.

"Then it's settled," James says with a grin; Kendall thinks James looks like a little kid with the way he's grinning and smiles to himself. The little pieces of toast crumbs that are lingering at the corners of his mouth help alleviate some of his nerves - somehow they make him much less intimidating.

"Are you guys ready to go?"

"Yep," Carlos says with a grin. Kendall helps him clear the table, and before too long they're piled into James's Range Rover and heading to some go-karting place James knows. Carlos cuddles up to Kendall in the backseat and Kendall catches James watching them as he drives, but he smiles and it helps alleviate some more of Kendall's tension.

Go-karting is probably the most fun Kendall's had in a long time; he wins two of the four races, and James wins the other two. Carlos pouts at both of them when they call a tie, and Kendall feels almost as comfortable around James as he does around Carlos.

Logan still makes him uncomfortable, though. When James and Carlos walk off to get them hot dogs from a nearby stand Logan motions Kendall over and leads him a little ways away from the other two.

Which means it's time for The Talk.

"So," Logan says, his hands in his pockets as he looks Kendall up and down. Kendall just sighs.

"I know you don't like me, Logan," he says, annoyed despite himself. "Just get it over with and tell me you think I'm a bad influence on Carlos, or that you don't want me around him or whatever the hell it is you're going to say."

"I don't," Logan agrees with a hard look at Kendall. "I don't want my best friend dating a prostitute, regardless of how much he says you hate it. But he cares about you, more than I think he should and I care about him, so I'm only going to say this - hurt him and you'll regret it."

Kendall almost laughs at how cliche it sounds, but Logan's words cut him deep. He opens his mouth to respond when his cellphone rings - it's the agency.

His heart sinks as he answers it. The agency tells him that Anderson called this morning to complain about him, that it's strictly against their policy for their escorts to assault clients and that rather than press charges against Kendall and draw unpleasant attention to the agency they'd "prefer it if he didn't return," and that his phone will be turned off immediately. They don't even give him a chance to explain, to defend his actions because he _wasn't wrong_, although somewhere in the back of Kendall's mind he knows he doesn't want to.

The phone drops from Kendall's hand as he stares ahead, eyes seeing nothing as terror grips him.

"Kendall?" Logan's voice is concerned and he steps forward, gripping Kendall's shoulder before turning and calling for Carlos.

Kendall is _screwed_. He can't make ends meet on the money he makes from working for Carlos. He could drop out of school again, but he's so close to graduating now, it'd kill him to drop out a second time.

The only other option is that he stops paying rent. He finally turns as he hears Carlos walk up, and Carlos immediately pulls him away from Logan.

"Kendall, what happened?" he asks urgently; Kendall's terror chokes him and he can't reply right away.

"Kendall, baby please, talk to me," Carlos begs, and the tone of his voice snaps Kendall back to himself.

"The agency…fired me, basically. I punched the guy that, you know, whipped me," he whispers, and he sees the mixed emotions on Carlos's face. Carlos pulls him into a hug and Kendall feels like he's about to break down but doesn't want to in front of Carlos's friends so he clings to Carlos, feeling like Carlos is the only thing anchoring him to the world.

"It's gonna be okay, beautiful," Carlos soothes, rubbing a hand over Kendall's back before leading him over to a bench and sitting him down. He pulls Kendall close again and murmurs, "I know what you're thinking, Kendall, and it's gonna be okay. I'm not gonna let you end up on the street."

"They're turning my phone off, too." Kendall's eyes close and his voice feels hollow, like the words are reverberating around his chest before they actually come out.

"I got you," Carlos responds simply. "I'm not gonna let anything happen to you, Kendall, I promise. I got you."

"Okay," Kendall whispers, feeling soothed when Carlos starts stroking his hair. "I'm gonna have to drop out of school."

"No you won't," Carlos says firmly. "I told you, I got you. Trust me, please."

Kendall opens his eyes and looks up at Carlos, feeling emotions overwhelm him again - there's one he's feeling stronger than even the panic, and it's too soon and it's scaring him to feel so strongly for someone but Carlos seems to transcend everything in his life.

"I love you," he all but mouths, but he knows Carlos understands when his eyes widen in shock, the shock quickly morphing into a soft smile. He leans down to kiss Kendall gently, a hand cupping his cheek.

"I love you too. It's too soon for that, you know," he says, voice teasing but Kendall can hear that he means it. It makes him laugh, albeit weakly.

"I know," he says ruefully. "I do, though. And I don't want to ruin our day, but at least Logan can't hate me for being a hooker anymore."

"Please tell me he didn't say that."

"Yeah." Kendall shrugs and sits upright. "It's nothing I wasn't expecting, though, it's okay. I wouldn't like me if I was him."

"Still." Carlos sighs and shoots a glare in Logan's direction. "Okay. Let's go hiking and we'll forget about this until tonight. But then you and I are gonna have a serious talk, okay?"

Kendall just laughs and leans in for a kiss before standing up and offering Carlos a hand.

"Deal. Let's go."

As Carlos takes his hand and squeezes Kendall feels more of the panic subside - he trusts Carlos to help him out of this mess.

Logan and James both eye Kendall curiously as Carlos leads him back to the group; Carlos shakes his head minutely, they can explain what happened later. They climb back into James's SUV and head out for Runyon Canyon, Carlos cuddled up against Kendall as his mind goes a mile a minute, trying to sort through all this.

Kendall won't accept charity, Carlos knows that much, which means just paying for something like his rent or school is out.

Carlos is okay with that; he doesn't want to be that kind of guy, and he knows Kendall wouldn't love him if he was.

And Kendall does love him. It's ridiculous - they've been seeing each other for less than a week, but Carlos figures that sometimes it just happens that way.

At the very least, Carlos might insist on getting Kendall a cellphone - that's one of those things that no one should be without, and he'd feel better knowing Kendall has one.

The issue is where Kendall's going to live.

Carlos thinks he might just break down and beg Kendall to move in with him. Once they get home tonight he's going to talk to James and Logan and make sure they're okay with it.

Or at least that James is and will convince Logan. Carlos frowns as he thinks about what Logan said to Kendall - he gets that Logan's just being an overprotective friend, but Carlos doesn't think he had to be such a dick about it.

Kendall looks down at him after a little while, a smile on his face that melts Carlos's heart.

"You're awfully quiet," he murmurs, pressing a kiss to Carlos's forehead.

"Just thinking," Carlos murmurs back, snuggling into Kendall as much as he can with the seatbelts in the way. "You wanna spend the night?"

"I should probably spend time in my apartment while I still have it," Kendall says, fear tinting his voice. "But thanks."

"Kendall, dude, are you spending the night?" James calls over his shoulder. "I have a bunch of video games I bet I could kick your ass on to make up for you cheating at go-karts."

Carlos could kiss James right now. It's exactly the invitation Kendall needs, because even though Kendall flushes Carlos sees the gratitude on his face.

"I didn't cheat," Kendall retorts. "It's not my fault you can't drive."

"Oh, it's on," James challenges gleefully, making Logan shake his head. "You're going down, get ready."

Carlos sees the indecision on Kendall's face for a split second before he smirks and replies, "Nice try, Diamond, but you're the one going down."

They bicker the rest of the way to Runyon Canyon, and Carlos thinks James is exactly what Kendall needs. They take off after each other once the car is parked and off, leaving Carlos and Logan behind just staring after them.

"So what happened?" Logan asks after they're out of earshot. "James loves him, by the way; Kendall's the best friend he's always wanted."

"Yeah? I'm more concerned that you told him you hated him for being a hooker," Carlos responds acidly.

Logan at least has the decency to look ashamed.

"You didn't answer my question," he says instead. "What was that phone call Kendall got? He looked terrified."

"He assaulted the guy that…you know, and the guy complained, so the agency told him not to bother coming back," Carlos says after a moment of indecision, still not totally comfortable with sharing details of that night and knowing how Logan will take that. "And before you start saying he must not want to quit because he was so upset over it, he's terrified he's going to end up on the street."

"So have him move in with us."

Carlos just stares - that was the last thing he was expecting.

"I know you're gonna ask anyway, and-" Logan breaks off and sighs, "-he's a good guy, Carlos, and he really seems to love you. I guess if he's not doing the hooker thing anymore I can get over it."

"Thank you," Carlos says softly. "I don't know what to do about that, though, he's not going to want to, he'll think it's charity. And he doesn't have a cellphone anymore either, I guess the agency gave him that."

"Let me ask you something first," Logan says with a hard look at Carlos. "Have you had sex with him yet? I know he's spent at least two nights in your bed."

"No, not yet." Carlos shakes his head. "It hasn't...Jesus this is awkward, but there hasn't been an opportunity."

Logan nods, Carlos can see the relief on his face.

"Can you just...I'll even ask him if you want, but will you just make him get an STD test before you sleep with him?" Logan asks, almost pleadingly. "I don't want you to get AIDS, and he might not even know he has something."

"Yeah, I was gonna bring that up, you know. When the time is right," Carlos says, motioning Logan to start following James and Kendall. "But dude, I don't know what to do about getting him to move in with us, he's not gonna want to do it. He'll drop out of school before he takes a handout from me."

"What if I suggest it?" Logan asks, and Carlos shrugs.

"Maybe. I think he might take it better if it comes from James, no offense."

"None taken. I haven't exactly been a nice guy." Logan looks at Carlos, apology in his eyes. "I'm sorry, Carlos, really. I've never seen you so happy before, not in all the years I've known you, and he seems like he is pretty awesome so...I'm just sorry I was such an asshole. I'll make it up to both of you."

Carlos stops and pulls Logan into a hug, almost overwhelmed.

"It's okay, dude. It's nice to know how much you care about me." He steps back and smiles. "And actually, I should thank you. For bringing us together. I didn't realize how much I needed him."

"Are you guys _ever_ coming?" James's voice calls from up ahead, and Carlos laughs.

"Come on," he says, dragging Logan forward. "Your obnoxious boyfriend is beckoning."

They catch up with Kendall and James, James grinning at both of them as he sweeps Logan off the ground and spins him.

"Hey," Kendall says with a shy smile. "That looked like a serious talk."

"Logan thinks you should move in with us," Carlos blurts without thinking about it. Kendall's eyes widen and cut over to Logan and James, and James's face has delight written all over it.

"Yeah, you totally should!" he says gleefully. "It'd be so awesome having you live with us!"

Kendall just stares, completely speechless.

"I..." he begins, trailing off and looking back at Carlos, "I don't want to take handouts, I can take care of myself."

"I know, beautiful," Carlos says, smiling and stepping forward to pull Kendall into his arms. "But it's not a handout. I want you to live with us so I can fall asleep every night with you in my arms, wake up next to you. The fact that it'll help you out money-wise is just a bonus."

"But don't you all split the bills?" Kendall asks, a critical gaze fixed on Carlos as he steps back to look at all of them. "I wouldn't be able to do that."

"So?" James says, grinning wider as he and Logan walk over. "Friends help each other out, dude, it's cool. When you can help pay you help pay, and if you can't then just do extra shit around the house...like you can take out garbage, I hate doing that."

Kendall laughs and Carlos can see the gratitude in his eyes, at being welcomed into the fold so readily.

"I want to think about it," he starts, and Logan holds up a hand to stop him.

"It's not charity, Kendall," he says firmly. "We know it seems that way, but James is right; friends help each other out. Just say yes so Carlos can stop trying to hide the panic attack he's about to have. We all want you to move in."

"Sorry," Carlos says sheepishly when Kendall looks at him. "He's right, though. It's a unanimous decision."

"Okay, okay," Kendall says, resignation and gratitude lacing the words. "I promise I'll help out however I can."

"Then it's settled. We can move you out this weekend, I think we're all free, and we'll make sure your lease is cancelled once it's up," Logan says, giving Kendall a smile that Carlos can see is genuine. "Now let's finish hiking."

Carlos laughs and lets James and Logan lead, dropping back and taking Kendall's hand.

"Will you do two things for me?" he asks, and Kendall arches an eyebrow.

"That depends on what it is."

"Logan wants you to get tested," Carlos starts, and Kendall nods in agreement, "and please let me get you a cellphone. I know you don't want handouts, but it's like an extra ten dollars to put you on my plan and the phone would be a gift. Please. I don't want you to not have one."

"Carlos." Kendall sighs before nodding. "Okay, fine. Thank you."

"I told you," Carlos says with a smile as they catch up with James and Logan. "I got you."

The smile on Kendall's face makes all of this shit worth it, Carlos thinks.


	9. Chapter 9

Short (and a little boring) one this time, don't hate me! As an apology I promise the next chapter will have sex...lol. Thank you to everyone that takes the time to review this, you're all the reason I keep posting.

* * *

When they get home that night James immediately yanks Kendall off into the house, shouting something about kicking his ass and that Kendall won't ever be able to live it down.

Kendall thinks James is pretty awesome - like a best friend and brother rolled all into one.

James leads him into a giant game room, with a pool table, giant tv and probably ever gaming system known to man.

"Damn," Kendall says, looking around the room in awe. "This is awesome."

"Thanks." James looks over and grins. "So Carlos seems like he really likes you."

Kendall groans and rubs a hand over his face.

"Logan already gave me the talk," he says, and James just laughs.

"I wasn't gonna do that, I know you know I'll kick your ass if you hurt Carlos." James tosses Kendall a game controller and plops down on the couch, motioning for Kendall to join him. "I was gonna tell you that Logan and I haven't ever seen him this happy, and that I think you're really awesome, too."

"Oh." Kendall's a little embarrassed as he sits down on the couch. "Thanks. And I care about him a lot too, so I'm not gonna do anything to hurt him, not intentionally anyway."

"Nah, I know," James says with a grin. "And you know, if shit happens because of what you do, it happens. Carlos is the kind of guy that'll stick with you through anything."

"Let's just hope it doesn't," Kendall says, thinking of all the possible ramifications of someone exploiting his history.

"Well if it does you've got all of us supporting you." James shoots Kendall a smile as they begin to play, Carlos and Logan coming downstairs after a little while to watch.

Once they call it a night Carlos leads Kendall back upstairs and into his bedroom, carefully helping him out of his clothes, a gentle smile on his face the whole time.

"Ready to spend the night in our bed?" he asks, and Kendall can't quite believe it, how he ended up with someone so amazing.

"Your bed," he retorts, his voice belying how much he loves that Carlos just called it their bed.

"Shut up and come cuddle me." Carlos all but leaps onto the bed and holds open his arms for Kendall, who doesn't waste any time in cuddling up next to him.

"Sleep, beautiful. We have things to do tomorrow." Carlos presses a kiss to Kendall's forehead and Kendall nods, a smile on his face as he falls asleep.

* * *

It seems like one blink and they're awake. Carlos looks down to see Kendall still sound asleep, so he carefully climbs out of bed to go make breakfast. When he returns Kendall is awake and just watching him as he walks through the door with a tray, like he can't quite believe any of this is real.

"You're amazing," he murmurs as Carlos sets the tray down and climbs back on the bed across from him. It makes his heart swell, to hear the love in Kendall's voice.

"Yeah yeah. Just eat, we've got things to do today."

"You know you don't have to buy me a cell phone," Kendall says, and Carlos scoffs - he knows that, but he wants to. Kendall is worth it.

"You can't not have one, Kendall. What if you're out and something happens?"

"You sound like my mo-" Kendall immediately snaps his mouth shut and looks down at his plate, making Carlos frown.

"Kendall?" Carlos tries hesitantly, but Kendall won't look at him. He lifts the tray off the bed and sets it on the dresser nearby, scooting closer to Kendall and tipping his chin up.

"Baby, talk to me, don't shut down like that."

"I'd rather not," Kendall whispers, and there's pain in his voice again. Carlos hates it.

"You've mentioned her before," Carlos says, remembering their first dinner together. "You said she basically disowned you?"

"More or less. She found out I was sleeping with people for money and I was so ashamed that I kind of stopped talking to her." Kendall sighs and leans towards Carlos like it's an instinct, so Carlos pulls him close and holds him tight.

"I mean, she was pissed when she found out, said she was so disappointed in me and couldn't believe I was doing something so immoral and there were better ways to make money," Kendall goes on, and Carlos's arms tighten, "but it was me that killed our relationship. By being a disappointment and then not being man enough to try to fix things."

"Do you want to?" Carlos asks curiously. "Fix things with her, I mean."

"She's my mom," Kendall says, voice barely audible. "She and my sister are the only family I have left."

Carlos nods and presses a kiss to the top of Kendall's head, figuring for now he's better off not asking why Kendall's dad wasn't included in that.

"How'd she find out?" he asks softly. Kendall sighs in resignation, and Carlos frowns. "You don't have to tell me."

"She found out because the agency required an emergency contact, in case a client went too far or something," Kendall says, burrowing closer to Carlos, "she was mine - I didn't have anyone else. About a month after I'd started actually having sex with clients the husband of the woman I was with came home early and found me fucking her. He kicked the shit out of me and I went to the hospital."

"Jesus, Kendall," Carlos breathes out. "So they told her where they were calling from?"

"Yeah, idiots," Kendall agrees miserably. "If they hadn't done that I could've played it off and said I got into a bar fight or something."

Carlos frowns and his brain starts racing again, wondering how to convince Kendall to make up with her.

"Where does she live? Minnesota?"

"Yeah." Kendall picks up his head and eyes Carlos suspiciously. "We're not going to see her."

"Don't you want to make up with her?" Carlos asks, cupping Kendall's cheek in his hand.

"She's my mom," is all Kendall says back. "She probably hates me."

"She probably doesn't."

"Whatever."

"Kendall." Carlos sits back and fixes Kendall with an exasperated look. "She's your mother, I can't believe she'd hate you. And you miss her, I can see it, so be a man and admit it. You're not doing the hooker thing anymore anyway, so I can't believe she wouldn't be happy to see you."

"Fine, you win. I miss her and I'm terrified to see her again because the last time I talked to her we fought and I've never heard her sound like that, okay?" Kendall's voice is almost a shout now, Carlos wincing at it but knowing Kendall needs to get it out. "I don't want her to tell me I'm no better than my deadbeat dad that left her after my sister was born because I _hate_ him, and I hate myself for disappointing her."

"Then we're going to see her," Carlos says, his voice brooking no argument and Kendall just sighs.

"Carlos, I really don't want to," he says, making Carlos frown. "I'm sorry, I know you think it's gonna be good for me or whatever but I don't want to. Not yet. I'm sorry."

"Kendall," Carlos starts, and Kendall shakes his head.

"No. Please."

Carlos can see that Kendall isn't going to budge, and he doesn't want to turn this into a big fight so he opts to let it go.

For now, anyway.

"Okay," he says resignedly, seeing a hint of fear tinting Kendall's gaze.

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Kendall, I don't want to force you to do something you're not comfortable with."

Kendall nods and cuddles back up to Carlos before whispering, "Thank you."

"Anything for you," Carlos says with a smile. "Now we should finish eating, we've got a lot of stuff to do today."

Kendall sits back and smiles at him, and Carlos hopes that eventually he'll be able to work up the courage to make up with his mom.

* * *

Four hours later they're home, with groceries and a cell phone that Kendall thinks was way too much for Carlos to give him, but Carlos had insisted and after the argument about his mom Kendall couldn't really bring himself to say no.

He didn't need an iPhone, though. Once they're inside and the groceries are away Carlos sits Kendall down on the couch and proceeds to instruct him in all the cool things the phone does, and okay, it is really awesome. But still.

There's a little part of Kendall that's scared to fight with Carlos, that's terrified that Carlos might decide he's not worth it if he's too difficult.

But then he remembers what James said; that they all support him and that Carlos will stick with him through anything, and it's enough to get him to relax.


	10. Chapter 10

Another short one, but as promised, sex. Nothing overly graphic, and I promise the next chapter will be longer. Thank you everyone for reading, and to those that celebrate it, Happy Thanksgiving!

* * *

A routine develops after the first week Kendall is living with Carlos. On days Carlos and Kendall both work they carpool to the restaurant, and the more Kendall works the more responsibility Carlos and Marla give him, which Kendall thinks is flattering and intimidating all at once.

On days Carlos takes off Kendall is allowed to borrow his car - Carlos adds him to the insurance and it makes Kendall feel like they're a little family, the four of them. Kendall makes up for not being able to pay bills by cooking, which he finds he has a knack for, and he and Carlos create recipes together, some of them even ending up on the restaurant's menu.

The problem, Kendall thinks after that first week, is that it's really hard to share a bed with a hot guy and not have sex. Kendall hasn't pushed, knowing Carlos doesn't want to until they make sure Kendall's clean and Kendall's been procrastinating on that a little because needles terrify him, but that doesn't make it any less frustrating.

And it definitely doesn't help when Carlos does things like walk out of the shower with just a towel wrapped around his shoulders one morning, because it makes Kendall do embarrassing things like stare. And probably drool.

Logan set up a test for Kendall the day that happened, after Kendall had all but begged him. It was easily the most awkward conversation he'd ever had.

Even with the tests rushed it still takes three days to get the results. But once Kendall has them he goes to find Carlos in his study, envelope in his back pocket, walking up from behind as silently as he can and resting his hands on Carlos's shoulders.

"I have something for you to read," he says as his hands start massaging and he bends down to kiss Carlos's neck. Carlos hums softly in appreciation and tilts his head to give Kendall better access, which he takes without hesitation.

"What's that?" Carlos's voice is husky, and Kendall knows if the results of the test are good, which he's sure they are since the agency required tests every three months for escorts that have sex as well, that he and Carlos won't leave the bedroom for at least a day.

"My test results." Kendall drops the envelope on the desk as he spins Carlos's chair and straddles his lap, arms looping around Carlos's neck as he leans in for a kiss.

"Give me that," Carlos mumbles through Kendall's lips, pushing him back gently and grabbing the envelope. He's silent as he reads and Kendall bites his lip in anticipation as he watches Carlos's face.

"All negative," he says, and Kendall hears a tiny bit of relief in his voice. "That's awesome."

"Were you worried?" Kendall asks, shoving away irritation. "I was always careful."

"I never doubted that, Kendall, but there's always a chance," Carlos says, voice soothing. It smoothes some of Kendall's ruffled feathers, but he's still stinging at the insinuation that he's irresponsible.

"Okay."

"Hey, seriously, I didn't mean it like that, beautiful." Carlos tips Kendall's chin and smiles. "It was never you being careful I was worried about, it was the other people. And if I sounded worried it was because I didn't want you to have to deal with having something. I promise."

Sometimes Kendall wonders if Carlos can read minds - he always knows exactly what to say. Kendall's still a little stung, but he supposes if he was Carlos he'd be reacting the same way.

"Okay," Kendall says again, but it sounds completely different this time. "Should we go make use of this newfound information?"

Carlos laughs and drags Kendall in for a heated kiss, and suddenly Kendall's body is on fire. He whines and writhes as Carlos's hands start roaming all over, sliding up under his shirt and fuck, hands on him should not ever feel that good.

"Bedroom. Now." Carlos's voice is a growl and Kendall shivers at it, thinking of all the ways he's going to evoke that sound in a few minutes. He stands and pulls Carlos with him, crushing their lips together again as they stumble toward the bedroom.

It seems like it takes them ages to finally get to Carlos's bedroom, hands fumbling with belts and buttons and Carlos finally gives up once the door is shut and tears Kendall's shirt off, which is really fucking hot.

"So how do you wanna do this?" Carlos asks as he shoves Kendall to the bed, wide eyed and a little bit desperate looking and it makes Kendall glad to know he wasn't the only one going crazy.

"However you want," Kendall says as he shimmies out of his jeans and tosses them at the clothes hamper before beckoning to Carlos.

"No, this isn't just about me." Carlos steps forward and yanks Kendall into a kiss. "What do you want?"

"Seriously, anything." Carlos's kiss makes Kendall groan and he's about to lose it already so he steps back and takes a deep breath.

"Seriously," he repeats, holding up a hand to stop Carlos from speaking, "I don't have a lot of boundaries, just nothing that causes pain or draws blood. I don't mind topping or bottoming, and, you know. If making me your bitch, or vice versa, gets you off I'm fine with stuff like that too, but nothing involving bodily fluids."

"Uh," Carlos starts, looking a little overwhelmed at the information. For a split second Kendall worries he's scared Carlos off, but then Carlos seems to relax and say, "Okay. What do you like best, though?"

"It depends on the person," Kendall says with a shrug. "I always pictured you topping when we did this."

At that Carlos nods and steps forward to pull Kendall back into his arms and kiss him hard. Kendall groans softly and walks backwards until his legs hit the bed and he collapses onto it, pulling Carlos with him.

"You're sure, right?" Carlos murmurs as his lips drag down Kendall's neck and nip at his collarbone, knocking a whine out of him, and Kendall nods in agreement.

"Yes, I'm sure, just fuck me, Carlos, please." He hears the pleading tone in his voice and smirks as it makes Carlos's whole body quake.

"Kendall, fuck," Carlos groans as he leans over Kendall to fumble in the dresser next to the bed and it's a haze after that, of lips and teeth and tongues and it's _amazing_, better than anything Kendall's ever experienced before.

Kendall's not surprised when once isn't enough for either of them; once they recover he spends what feels like forever blowing Carlos, loving the little noises Carlos lets out and the way he tries to refrain from pulling Kendall's hair but can't quite help it.

When they're finally spent it's dark outside, and Carlos turns to look at him with a rueful grin.

"We should probably go shower."

"Shower sex?" Kendall asks with an impish grin, and Carlos laughs and shoves at him weakly.

"I'm surprised you can walk."

"I haven't tried yet." Kendall shoots Carlos a wicked grin. "We'll see if you broke me."

"Well let's go then." Carlos rolls off the bed and offers Kendall a hand, and Kendall finds he can walk perfectly fine, if maybe a little shakily. Carlos ends up blowing him in the shower, something of which Kendall is rarely on the receiving end, and he's not surprised that it's amazing.

Carlos is amazing.

Finally they're cuddled back in Carlos's bed, exhausted but Kendall doesn't think he's ever been so content before. As he leans up to kiss Carlos before they both pass out Carlos murmurs how much he loves Kendall, making his heart swell. He replies in kind as his eyes slide shut and sleep takes him, content.


	11. Chapter 11

Okay, quite a bit longer this time - there is one sex scene in here, kind of, so warnings for that. To everyone that takes the time to review, thank you. This is halfway done, there's exactly eleven chapters to go (I just counted). Enjoy!

* * *

It seems like no time at all before almost a month has passed since the first time Kendall showed up on Carlos's doorstep, all charming smile and those green eyes that Carlos catches himself staring into more often than not.

Carlos decides to plan something that Kendall will probably say is too extravagant, but it's Kendall and Carlos is kind of weak where Kendall is concerned. He's sure Kendall will love what he's decided on.

Pretty sure, at least. He thinks there's a chance this might all backfire, but if it doesn't it'll be worth it.

It takes him a good week to plan everything out, ordering tickets and sweet talking James into letting Carlos borrow the jet he uses and finally, Carlos has everything set up the way he wants it. He sends Kendall in to the restaurant early to open, making sure Marla gives him a shift that will let him out early in the afternoon. He picks Kendall up when his shift is over, smiling as he walks out of the restaurant and slides into the car.

"Hey, beautiful." He leans over to kiss Kendall once he's buckled, feeling Kendall's smile against his lips. "I have a surprise planned for you."

"A surprise?" Kendall pulls back, a bright smile on his face. "What for?"

"We've been together a month, I wanted to do something special for it."

The way Kendall smiles at him is something Carlos thinks he won't ever get enough of and he reaches over to take Kendall's hand and squeeze.

"We're going away for the weekend, I packed all your stuff for you while you were at work. It go okay today?"

"Yeah." Kendall nods and smiles, squeezing Carlos's hand back. "Remember that guy that made Anna cry? He was in again today, asked for me to be his server because of what I did the last time he was in."

"Because you're amazing," Carlos says simply, and Kendall blushes. "You okay if we head to the airport from here? We've got a private plane so you can change on the way there."

"Where are we going?" Kendall asks, and Carlos just shakes his head mysteriously - he's also not sure how well Kendall will react to their destination and he'd rather get them there first.

"I can't get a hint?" Kendall tries, fixing Carlos with his best puppy dog eyes, and Carlos just laughs and shakes his head again.

"Nope. Just go along with it, I really hope you like where I'm taking you."

"I'm sure I will," Kendall says with a smile, "I'll be with you."

"Cheeseball," Carlos teases, but he gets it - there's a lot of things he thinks he'd enjoy if he was with Kendall. Kendall just laughs at him and turns to look out the window as Carlos drives, and they end up sleeping on the plane. Kendall tries a few more times to get Carlos to spill where they're going but Carlos is firm, even going so far as to make sure their pilot doesn't give it away.

It isn't until they've landed and de-planed that Kendall finally recognizes where they are - Carlos braces for Kendall to explode when his expression tightens.

"Why," he says slowly, turning to Carlos with an unreadable expression on his face, "are we in Minneapolis? Is this some ploy to get me to talk to my mother?"

"I actually did this so I could take you to see the Minnesota Wild play," Carlos says carefully, because it's true - it hadn't even crossed his mind when he planned it, because he has no idea where Kendall grew up. "It had nothing to do with your mom, Kendall, really."

Kendall looks stricken at the mention of hockey, and Carlos suddenly worries he really fucked up with this.

"Carlos," he says softly, and Carlos immediately leads Kendall over to a bench and sits him down, cupping Kendall's face in his hands. He hasn't seen Kendall look like this since that night his client went too far.

"Why?" Kendall finally asks. "Why the Wild?"

"I took a guess," Carlos says, brushing his thumb over Kendall's lips as he tries to quell his own burgeoning panic, "since you grew up in Minnesota and went to school on a hockey scholarship I figured it made sense that you'd like the Wild, you know? Baby, please talk to me, I'll take you right back home if you want."

"The Wild is the team I was going to play for after I graduated," Kendall all but whispers, and fuck, Carlos did screw this up. He's dangled everything Kendall can't have anymore in front of him.

"Shit, Kendall, I'm sorry."

"They scouted me and everything, I was going to be a second string center," Kendall continues, and Carlos feels really, really fucking bad now, "by now I could've been starting."

"You know that dream isn't gone," Carlos says before he can stop himself, and Kendall snorts.

"I can't play, Carlos," he says with a hint of condescension in his voice. "Remember? My knees are shot."

"You said you needed surgery," Carlos responds desperately. "I could help you with that, Logan could perform the surgery and you wouldn't have to worry about the money-"

"No." Kendall is firm as he cuts Carlos off. "I'm not taking charity from you, or anyone else, Carlos. I love you, and I love that you want to do that for me, but I can't let you pay for something like that."

"Please," Carlos begs softly. "Let me do this for you, or at least think about it, please. I know you don't want charity but I love you so much, Kendall, I hate that you could have this if it wasn't for the money."

Carlos sighs as Kendall shakes his head.

"I can't, I can't let you do that," he says with a sad smile. "I should be able to do something like that on my own."

"What if you and Logan worked something out?" Carlos tries desperately. "Like as far as making payments or something, you know he would for you."

"Sometimes I think there's no saying no to you," Kendall teases softly, and Carlos lets out a breath he didn't realize he was holding when Kendall smiles. "Let me think about it, okay? I'm not going to let you just pay for the whole thing, but working something out with Logan wouldn't be bad. I'm not promising anything but that I'll think about it."

"That's good enough for me," Carlos says with a smile, pulling Kendall in for a gentle kiss. "And I'm sorry, beautiful, I had no idea that this would be such a bad idea."

"Hey." Kendall sits back and looks at Carlos seriously. "This is amazing, Carlos, do you have any idea? You flew me to my home state to see my favorite hockey team ever play, and there's no way you could have known this was the team I was gonna play for, babe. It's okay, I still love you."

"I love you too," Carlos says, resting his forehead against Kendall's and smiling as Kendall pulls his head up to kiss it. "I probably should've run this by you, huh?"

"I would've said no." Kendall chuckles and dips back down to kiss Carlos's lips once more before pulling away. "We should get going, there are better places for us to make out. Where are we staying?"

"Here in Minneapolis, I rented a car for us." Carlos stands and offers Kendall a hand, feeling a little weak with relief as they make their way to a shuttle that will take them to the rental car facility.

"You're amazing, do you know that?" Kendall asks as they walk, making Carlos smile.

"You're pretty amazing yourself."

"No, not really. I'm just lucky." Kendall shoots Carlos an mischievous grin. "And we really don't need to be one of those gross couples that fights over which one is more amazing."

Carlos just laughs.

"Fine, fine, you can just accept you are and we'll be done."

"Ass." Kendall shoves at Carlos playfully. "So what else are we doing here? Just hockey?"

"Anything you want," Carlos responds as they get on the shuttle and take a seat. "The game is tomorrow night and I'm taking you to dinner before it, but I don't really know if there's anything to do in Minnesota so I figured you could pick today."

"Hey, don't knock my home state," Kendall says seriously, but Carlos sees a hint of a smile in his eyes. "There isn't a lot, but there's a couple museums or like, kayaking on the river."

"Kayaking," Carlos says immediately, making Kendall smile at him. "That cool?"

"Yeah, I've never done it before," Kendall responds with a grin. "Let's get to the hotel and we can go."

"You got it." Carlos cuddles up against Kendall as the shuttle makes a few stops, and before too long they're at the car Carlos rented.

"What, no Mercedes this time?" Kendall teases as he stows their luggage in the trunk. "I didn't think a Mini Cooper was your style."

Carlos makes a face as he slides into the drivers' seat and starts the car, Kendall just smirking at him.

"This thing is awesome, look at it," he protests, and Kendall just laughs.

"C'mon, babe, let's go, it's been like twelve hours since we've had sex, I wanna get to the hotel."

"Horndog," Carlos says with a laugh as he pulls out of the rental facility, swatting at Kendall's hand as it creeps up his thigh. "Stop that, I don't want to crash a car that isn't mine."

"Fine." Kendall lets out a long suffering sigh and fixes Carlos with a pout. "I give really good road head, just so you know."

"You little shit," Carlos groans, shoving Kendall's hand away again. "You can blow me once we're at the hotel."

"Not the point," Kendall says silkily as his fingers dart back to brush over Carlos's dick. "It's more fun when you can't react to it the way you want."

"You're a fucking sadist," Carlos whines, feeling his resolve crumble and he knows Kendall sees it, because he blinks and his jeans are popped open and Kendall's eyeing him hungrily.

"Probably," Kendall agrees with a wicked grin, Carlos shuddering as Kendall reaches over further to palm him through his boxers.

"Fuck, Kendall." Carlos hasn't ever felt anything so intense, which is ridiculous because it's just a hand, but he thinks Kendall might have a point. Might.

"Damnit, fine, if you want to suck my dick that badly then do it and fucking hurry."

Carlos's hand tangles in Kendall's hair as Kendall leans over and _fuck_. Kendall wasn't kidding about being amazing at this, about it being more fun because his eyes have to stay on the road, or because he has to focus on not hitting the gas or the brake pedals too hard every time Kendall's teeth scrape him just right and thank god he comes at a stoplight or he'd have put the gas pedal through the floor.

"Good, right?" Kendall's grinning like a Cheshire cat as he settles back into his seat, chuckling at Carlos trying to catch his breath.

"Yeah, fine, you win."

"I know." Kendall's voice is smug and Carlos glares halfheartedly at him, making him laugh.

"I love you too, babe," he says, grin still on his face.

Carlos just shakes his head and keeps driving, smiling despite himself as Kendall leans over to kiss his cheek.

They check in and drop their luggage off before heading to the kayaking place, and it's the most fun Carlos has had in a long time, even though he capsizes his kayak. Twice.

Once Carlos is dry and they're back in the car they spend the rest of the afternoon driving around Minneapolis, Kendall's head on Carlos's shoulder as he drives. The more they drive the quieter Kendall gets, and Carlos wonders if he's fallen asleep until Kendall finally speaks.

"Make a left here."

Carlos does, following Kendall's directions until they're in a residential neighborhood and Kendall asks him to stop.

"Where are we?" Carlos asks softly, although he's got a pretty good idea. Kendall's silent, staring out the front window at a house in the middle of the block and Carlos knows then, that they're sitting outside Kendall's mom's house.

"Kendall?" Carlos is still quiet, not sure why but the moment seems to merit it as he whispers, "We could go see if anyone's home."

"What if she doesn't want to see me?" Kendall asks softly.

"What if she does?" Carlos challenges. "I can come with you if you want - as your boyfriend or just a friend, whatever is easier."

"I..." Kendall trails off and looks at Carlos pleadingly, "don't know. I'm sorry."

Carlos shakes his head and leans over to kiss Kendall gently, understanding both meanings behind what Kendall said.

"No apologizing, beautiful. Let's go, I'd rather you didn't do this alone."

The look Kendall fixes him with breaks his heart and makes him smile all at once. Kendall nods decisively and unbuckles, reaching for Carlos's hand once they're both out of the car.

"I got you," Carlos whispers, squeezing Kendall's hand as he rings the doorbell. It's opened a few seconds later by a girl in her late teens, obviously Kendall's sister.

"Kendall?" She blinks at him in disbelief and Carlos sees Kendall nod hesitantly.

The next thing Carlos registers is the girl's fist connecting with Kendall's jaw and Kendall letting out a cry of pain, and it shocks him so much that he can't even react and get Kendall away from this girl.

"Jesus, Katie! What the fuck was that for?"

"For being an idiot." Katie's tone is offhand while her eyes are angry, hurt, but Carlos thinks he sees relief in seeing Kendall as well. It gives him hope.

He watches as Kendall's face falls and steps forward to intercede, but Kendall stops him with a look. Carlos nods and backs off, asking with his eyes if Kendall is okay, hoping Kendall has this handled.

"Where's mom?" Kendall asks.

"Inside. God, I hope she lets you have it, do you have any idea what you did to her?" As Kendall opens his mouth to reply Katie's eyes fall on Carlos and she surveys him in a way that makes Carlos feel like he's being sized up for a kill.

"Who's this?"

It takes Kendall a minute to answer. Katie's eyes travel down to where Kendall has moved to grip Carlos's hand and she just gazes at them knowingly.

"Looks like you have a lot of things to tell us," she says, but her gaze holds no judgement. "Come inside, moron, I'll get mom."

"Carlos," Kendall calls after her, and Katie doesn't even glance back.

"Hi, Carlos!" she calls back, and it's enthusiastic enough to make Carlos feel a little more at ease.

Kendall shoots Carlos an apologetic smile as he leads them in and perches cautiously on the edge of the couch in the living room. Carlos stands next to him, a hand on his shoulder.

"You okay?" Carlos asks softly, and Kendall nods, looking up and smiling at him.

"She doesn't mean anything by it, not really. She was a violent kid, but she's got a good heart. Just...let me handle this?" Kendall chuckles softly at the mention of Katie but his eyes are pleading with Carlos as Katie returns with a woman who's clearly their mother. Carlos nods again and squeezes Kendall's shoulder, hoping to be reassuring.

"Hi," Kendall says, so soft he's barely audible. His mother just stares at him for a second before flying at him and wrapping him up in a hug, and Carlos can hear her sobbing. He takes an uncomfortable step back as Kendall comforts her, meeting Katie's gaze and recoiling at the intensity of it. It's equal parts anger, relief and Carlos sees love there too, watches Katie's eyes soften as she watches Kendall hug their mother.

Kendall's mother finally pulls back, wiping tears from her eyes as she glares at him.

"You have a lot of explaining to do, young man," she says, sitting on the coffee table across from Kendall and crossing her arms.

"I know." Kendall's voice is soft and ashamed, and Carlos can see he won't meet her eyes.

"I told him you're gonna kill him," Katie offers with a wicked gleam in her eye, and Carlos wants to step in but remembers Kendall's request.

"Katie!" their mother admonishes, making Katie shrug and roll her eyes.

"When are you gonna learn that corporal punishment is the only thing that works on him?" That evil gleam is back in Katie's eye, but now Carlos is reminded of his own younger siblings and how they liked to torment him.

"Stop that." Their mother looks back at Kendall, and Carlos feels like an outsider so he moves back another step, catching Katie's attention.

"Oh, mom, this is Carlos. Kendall's boyfriend." She says the last word with relish, but in a way that makes Carlos feel less like he's being judged and more like he's being initiated. Their mother starts and looks up at Carlos apologetically.

"I'm so sorry," she says as she stands, "I'm Jennifer, but Kendall's friends all call me Mama Knight."

Carlos shakes her hand, feeling really, really fucking awkward as she turns back to Kendall.

"Boyfriend?" she asks, gentle but unyielding, and Carlos immediately knows where Katie gets her scariness from. Kendall nods, looking ashamed and defiant all at once.

"Yeah."

Mrs. Knight just sighs and rubs a hand over her face.

"Okay, boyfriend. That's the least of my worries right now, I'm more concerned with why you suddenly decided to show up here. Is something wrong?"

Carlos admires Mrs. Knight for how well she's taking all this. Kendall shakes his head.

"No. Carlos brought me here to see the Wild play and...I just-" he breaks off and Carlos hears him choke up, "-missed you, mom. I came to say I'm sorry for being such a fuck up."

"Kendall, language!" Mrs. Knight admonishes, and Katie walks over and plops down next to Kendall on the couch, cuffing him on the back of the head in a way that seems like it's almost affectionate.

"You know you're only a fuck up because you stopped calling," she says, exasperation dripping from every word.

"Katie!"

"Sorry. But it's true! So he made some bad career decisions, that doesn't mean we stopped loving him!"

Carlos resists the urge to interrupt and pull Kendall into his arms as he sees Kendall's eyes well with tears. It's hard, but when Kendall reaches for his hand and squeezes it in a vice grip it's enough to hold him back.

"I'm sorry," he hears Kendall whisper. "I was ashamed."

"Kendall, honey, I still love you," Mrs. Knight says softly. "I don't agree with how you're making your extra money, but me loving you never, ever changed. You're still my son, I never wanted you to disappear like that."

"I don't do it anymore," Kendall says softly. "I work full time for Carlos now."

"Dating your boss?" Katie lets out a cackle and eyes Carlos gleefully. "But that's good, bro, that you uh, gave up your corner office."

Kendall rolls his eyes and throws a pillow at her.

"Is that how you two met? Working for him?" Mrs. Knight asks, motioning Carlos closer, and he sits on the arm of the couch next to Kendall, hand still gripping Kendall's tight.

"No." Kendall shakes his head. "One of Carlos's friends uh, hired me for him. To be his date and it kind of went from there."

"So you got a pity job?"

Carlos wonders vaguely if he should be afraid of Katie.

"No," Kendall retorts, swatting at her. "I'd already been working for him, I just didn't know it, we kept missing each other."

"So you don't do the...other job, anymore?" Mrs. Knight asks delicately, and Kendall shakes his head.

"No. I had a bad experience and stopped. Carlos and his friends, James and Logan, let me move in with them."

"Too bad it's not _that_ James and Logan," Katie says wistfully, and for a moment Carlos is really confused, because there's probably a million 'James and Logans' in the world. "James Diamond is so hot."

Carlos bursts out laughing at that, making Mrs. Knight and Katie stare at him.

"It is," he clarifies once he's caught his breath, because now he gets it. "Logan Mitchell and I grew up together."

"Why," Katie says to Kendall slowly, making Carlos brace for an attack, "did you not tell me you live with _James fucking Diamond_?! I don't care _what_ you're doing or _how_ long it's been since your ugly face has been around here, as my big brother that's something you should have told me!"

Carlos breathes a sigh of relief when Kendall laughs.

"Shut up, Katie," he teases. "Maybe you'll get to meet him now."

"I'd fucking better!"

"Katie! Language!"

"Sorry," Katie says without apology. "But mom, seriously! James Diamond! You love him!"

"James Diamond doesn't give you the right to swear!" Mrs. Knight insists, but Carlos sees that look in her eye too, that starstruck wide eyed gleam James's fans get when they're all out and James is stopped.

"If you want to meet him I'm sure I can work something out," he says, making Katie nod approvingly, "he loves meeting his fans."

When Mrs. Knight smiles at him Carlos breathes a sigh of relief - he'd been half worried this would end in disaster.

"Carlos, sit down, make yourself comfortable," Mrs. Knight instructs, and Kendall slides over to make room, cuddling up to him once he's settled.

"Gross." Katie fakes a gagging noise as Carlos's arm drapes over Kendall's shoulders. "Seriously, Kendall, I don't need to see that."

"It's just cuddling," Carlos says firmly, hoping Katie's just teasing - he's pretty sure she is, but he can't stand intolerance and wants to make that perfectly clear right now. Katie laughs and shakes her head.

"Watch your brother cuddle someone with a sickening smile on his face like that and you'll be grossed out too. It's not because you're a guy, Carlos, it's because it's Kendall."

Carlos nods in agreement, glad he seems to be able to get a read on Katie now.

"Katie," Mrs. Knight warns before turning to Kendall and Carlos with a smile.

"Who Kendall dates isn't an issue here, Carlos," she begins firmly, and part of Carlos wonders why Kendall was so ashamed to keep talking to her, this woman is amazing, "we don't tolerate prejudice in this house. Cuddle as much as you want."

"But really don't," Katie adds with a smirk, making Carlos laugh.

"So Carlos, tell us about yourself," Mrs. Knight requests. "What do you do for a living?"

Carlos really hates this part.

"I own a restaurant in Los Angeles," he says, his arm tightening around Kendall minutely. "I opened it when I graduated college three years ago, but it wasn't until James and Logan started dating that it really got on the map."

"Oh, is that the one he always talks about?" Katie asks excitedly. "That's awesome, that's your place? Damn, Kendall, I thought you were gonna get rich from hockey, but this works too."

"Shut up," Kendall laughs, but Carlos hears the pain in his voice. His mother must hear it too, because her smile dies and she leans forward to take Kendall's hands in her own.

"It just means it wasn't meant to be, Kendall," she says, and Kendall nods sadly.

"There's a possibility he can have the surgery he needs to let him play again," Carlos says before he can help himself. Mrs. Knight looks at him in surprise.

"How so?"

"Logan is willing to perform the surgery," Carlos explains, ignoring Kendall glaring at him because the words are spilling out of Carlos's mouth like word vomit, he can't stop, "I've already offered to give Kendall the money for the procedure but he turned it down."

"Never turn down money from a rich guy, Kendall," Katie interrupts sagely, making Carlos chuckle. He likes this girl.

"The offer is still open," he says, continuing to ignore Kendall and how stiff he is because he knows he's playing dirty and he know he's going to get in trouble for it later but all he wants is to be able to do this for Kendall, "and I have no expectation of repayment."

"Carlos, that's so generous of you, but we couldn't," Mrs. Knight says, and Carlos sighs even though he was prepared for it. "If my health insurance was better it would have covered what the university didn't, but they refused to pay."

Carlos wonders if maybe there's some way he can help that way - his health insurance is good enough to cover a surgery of that magnitude. The problem is that Kendall would have to be his-

He cuts that thought off before it can blossom, knowing now isn't the time.

Later, he thinks.

"Carlos?" Kendall asks softly, and Carlos realizes he zoned out.

"Sorry," he replies sheepishly. "I was thinking."

Kendall leans back and eyes him curiously and Carlos shakes his head.

"Are you boys hungry?" Mrs. Knight asks, breaking the tension of the moment. Kendall turns to her and Carlos sees him smile gratefully.

"We haven't eaten yet, we went kayaking on the Mississippi river today," he says, snuggling back into Carlos. Carlos smiles and drops a kiss on the top of his head and looks up at Mrs. Knight.

"I don't want to intrude, if you'd like to spend some time alone I don't mind going back to the hotel for awhile."

"Thank you," Mrs. Knight says softly, and Kendall sits up abruptly.

"He doesn't need to leave, mom, don't make him." There's a hint of panic in his voice, so Carlos squeezes him again to soothe him.

"Hey," he says, and Kendall looks at him pleadingly. "It's okay, beautiful, just call me when you want me to come back, okay?"

Kendall looks like he wants to argue but Carlos shakes his head minutely - Kendall needs this.

"Okay," he finally says in resignation. "Let me at least walk you out?"

"Sure." Carlos stands and offers Kendall a hand, surprised when Mrs. Knight stands and pulls him into a hug.

"We'll talk soon," she says in his ear, and Carlos nods as he pulls back, staving off intimidation at her words. Kendall leads him to the door and kisses him hard, trembling slightly in Carlos's arms.

"It's gonna be okay, beautiful," Carlos says softly, pulling back and sweeping Kendall's hair off his face. "Call me."

"I will." Kendall still looks nervous, and Carlos gets it - just from the little time he's been around them he can tell Kendall's family isn't going to really lay into him in front of Carlos. "I love you."

"I love you too, Kendall." Carlos smiles and leans up for one more kiss before turning and walking out to the car, and as he drives to the hotel he hopes that when Kendall calls later things will have gone the way he's hoping they do.


	12. Chapter 12

Just so everyone knows, updates might be late between now and Christmas - I work at the #4 busiest mall in the country, so for the next two and a half weeks my job owns my life. But! This is completely written and just waiting to be posted, so it WILL get there. :)

* * *

Once Carlos's car is out of Kendall's sight he turns and heads back inside, feeling slightly sick with nerves. His mom's expression hasn't changed, and she smiles gently at him as he sits back down.

"So," she says, hesitation in her voice, "are you...gay, Kendall? Should I have seen this coming?"

The question makes Kendall's stomach clench.

"I thought you said you didn't care." His voice is defiant, but all Mrs. Knight does is shake her head.

"I don't, Kendall, but I have a right to ask."

"No, I'm not," Kendall responds after a moment. "I still like girls too."

"So how'd you decide you like guys?" Katie asks shamelessly, and Kendall feels his face flush.

"I, uh..." he trails off and looks away.

"Got it," Katie says knowingly. "It's okay, Kendall, I don't care if you found out because of the hooker thing."

Kendall looks up at her in shock, not expecting her to be so brazen.

"Katie," Mrs. Knight warns gently. "Don't be so rude, that's a sensitive topic."

"But it shouldn't be," Katie protests, shoving Kendall gently. "It is what it is and he said he doesn't do it anymore so what's the big deal? He's not a bad person."

Kendall smiles at Katie, knowing he's never been more grateful for her than he is in this moment.

"Thanks," he says, and Katie just grins at him.

"So about Carlos," Mrs. Knight says after a pause. "Is it serious between you two?"

"Serious how?" Kendall asks. "We're not getting married or anything like that."

"But you live with him," she prompts.

"Yes." Kendall wonders what she's driving at before it hits him and his eyes widen. "Oh god, please don't tell me you're going to give me the safe sex talk, mom, we did this already."

"There's a lot of diseases that are prominent in gay men," Mrs. Knight says, looking determined to continue talking, "honey, I just want you to be safe. Have you both been tested?"

"Yes," Kendall groans. "I got tested every three months when I was...you know."

"Selling sex?" Katie offers with a smirk.

"Katie!" Mrs. Knight glares at her, making her shrug.

"He was."

"Don't be so callous," Mrs. Knight chastises before turning back to Kendall. "So you live with him."

"Yes," Kendall agrees. "It was that, live on the street or drop out of school. He, James, and Logan offered, and I accepted."

"And you love him," she says, and even though it's not phrased like a question Kendall knows it is.

"Yeah," he says softly. "A lot. I don't deserve him at all but I knew after a week that I loved him, and I know you're gonna say I'm crazy but he's…not like anyone I've ever met before."

"Gross." Katie fakes gagging, and Kendall decides it's appropriate to shove her. She slaps him.

"Stop it, you two. Katie, give me a few minutes alone with Kendall, please."

"Fine." Katie huffs as she stands, flicking Kendall's ear once more before she walks off. Mrs. Knight waits until she's gone to fix Kendall with a gaze that makes him feel guiltier than he has in a long time.

"I'm sorry," he says softly. "I…"

"Kendall, I already told you it's okay," Mrs. Knight says, reaching out to squeeze Kendall's knee. "I wish you hadn't done what you did, and it's going to take some me some time to get used to you being in a relationship with another boy, but I love you. What made you think you had to disappear like that?"

Kendall heaves a miserable sigh - this was why he didn't want to talk to his mother.

"I was ashamed of myself." His voice is a whisper, making Mrs. Knight lean in to hear him. "I hated myself so much for getting involved in something like that, do you have any idea? I couldn't believe you'd be proud to have me as your son when I was selling sex, as Katie put it, so I figured it'd be better if I just wasn't in your life."

"Never," Mrs. Knight says softly. Kendall just nods.

"I won't do it again, I need you and Katie."

"Good." Mrs. Knight smiles and sits back. "Now what's this about Carlos offering to pay for your surgery? He's not..." she trails off and looks uncomfortable.

"No, he's not paying me to live with him," Kendall says firmly. "I wouldn't be here if he was."

"I was only asking."

"I know." Kendall sighs. "I just...he means so much to me, mom, it almost scares me. I don't know what I'd do without him and I've only been seeing him a month."

The way his mom smiles at him makes Kendall feel like he never left, like everything is back to normal.

"I'm glad you're happy, honey," she says, and Kendall almost gets choked up because his life finally feels whole again. Mrs. Knight must see it in his face because she pulls him into a tight hug and Kendall clings to her, knowing he can never repay Carlos for everything he's done.

He pulls back after a few minutes and his mom just smiles.

"Call Carlos and have him pick you up, Kendall. Do you boys want to come over for breakfast tomorrow?"

"That'd be great." Kendall shoots his mom a grateful smile. "I'll make sure he doesn't have plans for us, all he told me we were doing was the game and dinner."

"Just let me know," Mrs. Knight says with a smile. "And give me his cellphone number before you go? I'd like to be able to get in touch with you."

"He actually gave me one." Kendall pulls out his ridiculous iPhone and shows his mom. "That was the first thing he did when he realized I didn't have one."

Mrs. Knight shakes her head slightly.

"He seems like he takes very good care of you."

"He does." Kendall smiles as he sees a text from Carlos come in. "I really love him."

"You can have him come back," Mrs. Knight says once she has Kendall's number written down. "I'd like it if you boys could spend time here tonight, I want to get to know Carlos better."

"That's fine," Kendall says with a smile as he responds to Carlos's text. "Thank you, by the way. For being so accepting."

"I love you," Mrs. Knight says simply. "No matter what."

"I love you too." He falls silent as they wait for Carlos, Kendall all but rushing to the door and flinging it open.

"Hi, beautiful. That wasn't that long." Carlos fixes Kendall with a hesitant look, eyes questioning and Kendall just smiles.

"It's okay," he whispers. "My mom wants us to spend some time here tonight, is that okay?"

He almost sees Carlos sigh in relief.

"Yeah, of course, babe." He leans up and kisses Kendall gently before stepping into the house. Kendall takes his hand as they walk back into the living room, where Mrs. Knight is waiting. They sit down and Kendall feels at home as they start talking, finally feels like he has everything he could ever want in his life.

* * *

Kendall goes off with Katie after dinner, leaving Carlos alone with their mom, and while Carlos isn't exactly intimidated he's sure as hell not completely at ease.

"So," Mrs. Knight begins, making Carlos cringe.

"This is the part where I get the 'hurt Kendall and you die' lecture, isn't it."

Mrs. Knight just laughs.

"Yes. But since you already know that, we'll skip it." She looks at Carlos with a kind smile. "Just watch out for Katie, she can be...devious."

Like Carlos hadn't already figured that one out. He nods, though, bracing for the interrogation he's sure is coming.

"I kind of got that feeling," he says with a slight laugh, and Mrs. Knight laughs in agreement.

"She's very protective of Kendall," she says, and Carlos nods again; he figured that out too. "But she seems like she likes you, which is a good sign. And you seem to really care about Kendall."

"I do," Carlos says in earnest, leaning forward slightly, "Kendall means everything to me, Mrs. Knight, I can't imagine my life without him."

"Does that mean marriage is in your future with him?" Mrs. Knight asks, and Carlos blinks in surprise. It _is_ on his mind, has been since they talked about health insurance, but it seems so soon for that.

"I..." he trails off, knowing not answering is as good as saying yes. Mrs. Knight nods in understanding.

"You would be welcome into my family, Carlos. Anyone that can make Kendall look that happy, and bring him back to me is someone I would welcome as a son in law."

Carlos feels his heart swell with emotion, so grateful to this woman for being so accepting.

"Thank you," he says softly. "It's not on the table yet, it actually hadn't even crossed my mind until you brought up health insurance. I realized that if Kendall and I were married we could use mine to cover his surgery."

"Don't let that be the reason," Mrs. Knight warns. "If you ask him to marry you I expect it to be because you love him."

"I do," Carlos says hastily, wincing at the stern look in Mrs. Knight's eyes. "I would never marry him just for that, and besides, I don't really think I'm ready to get married yet."

"Good." Mrs. Knight nods in approval, "because if you get married for the wrong reasons you'll never last. I'm glad to know you want to for the right reasons."

"I know. I just wish there was some way to get him on my insurance without that." Carlos sighs wistfully at the thought; he wants so badly to be able to help Kendall play hockey again.

"Does he get benefits through his job?" Mrs. Knight questions, and the idea hits Carlos like a ton of bricks. He slaps his forehead ruefully, because it's so _simple_.

"Yeah, he does."

"So he could go through that to cover the surgery?"

Carlos wants to kiss this woman.

"Yeah. They might try to fight a claim that large, though."

"There are ways around that, sometimes," Mrs. Knight says, looking thoughtful. "You'll have to look into exactly what his insurance covers and go from there, but since it'd technically be rehabilitation from an accident it should be covered."

"You think so?" Carlos questions. "Even if it was a few years ago?"

"I don't know, really," Mrs. Knight sighs, her brow furrowing. "Do you have a physician Kendall could see that could speak to the insurance company on your behalf? A knee injury like what Kendall has isn't life threatening, but the doctors told us the longer it's left unattended the greater his chances are for serious problems as he gets older."

"I do, actually." Carlos nods eagerly. "Logan, my best friend, is one of the top surgeons in California. He's already suggested Kendall come in for an exam, so that'd' be perfect."

"Good." Mrs. Knight smiles at him. "You don't know how much it means to him to have you want to do this, even if he keeps rebuffing your offers. He was so depressed when his scholarship was revoked he didn't have the surgery out of principle, I'm sure he hasn't quite accepted it's within his reach again. I didn't agree with his decision, but he's stubborn and sometimes a little thick headed." She pauses and shakes her head, affection and exasperation both evident in the gesture.

"And it means a lot to me, too, Carlos - I've never seen someone care about Kendall this much."

Carlos smiles - he has an idea how much it means to them. He makes a mental note to, as soon as they're home, make damn sure Kendall's policy will cover his surgery, no matter what he has to do.

At that moment Kendall's head pokes into the room.

"Mom, are you done interrogating him yet? I kinda like him, don't scare him off."

Carlos just laughs.

"Come here, beautiful," he says, and as Kendall enters Carlos sees tension leave him. He settles himself on Carlos's lap, an arm around Carlos's shoulders as he fixes his mother with a half hearted glare.

"Kendall, relax," Mrs. Knight says exasperatedly. "We were just talking, I haven't done anything to scare him away."

"You can't get rid of me that easily," Carlos adds, kissing Kendall's cheek. "Promise."

"Okay." Kendall seems to relax the rest of the way at Carlos's words, settling back into him in contentment. Carlos smiles and hopes, as they fall into easy conversation, that seeing hockey live again will be enough to motivate Kendall to fight to play again.


	13. Chapter 13

Short one this time - I'm so sorry it's been so long since I got a chapter of this up, I think I sold my soul to my job the last two and a half weeks, wow. To those that celebrate it, Merry Christmas, and to those that don't Happy December 25th!

* * *

Carlos is pretty sure that his plan worked - Kendall had been reserved and quiet at the game until the first period was over, and as the game went on Carlos saw his eyes light up more and more at the players. By the end of the second period Kendall was on his feet, shouting at the players, the coaches, the referees and goading the players on when they got into fights.

In the brief time Carlos has known Kendall he's never seen Kendall's face light up quite like this.

"That was amazing," Kendall says as they walk out of the arena, and even though hockey isn't one of Carlos's favorite things he thinks he could definitely get into it - at the very least, he knows watching Kendall play is something he'll enjoy. His hand slips into Kendall's and squeezes, smiling at the look on Kendall's face.

"I'm glad you had fun."

"Of course I did." Kendall smiles at him, stopping them to kiss Carlos soundly. "Thank you."

"You don't have to thank me," Carlos murmurs against Kendall's lips. "Anything else you want to do tonight?"

The kiss Kendall answers him with makes words unnecessary - a silence falls over them as they return to the hotel, desire tangible between them. As they fall into bed together Carlos senses a change in Kendall; there's a desperation in him that Carlos knows has nothing to do with him and everything to do with hockey.

As he falls asleep, once Kendall is finally sated, he knows it's only a matter of time now.

* * *

They stay in Minnesota for a few days longer than Carlos had originally planned - Kendall hadn't said it, but Carlos could see how much he wanted to spend time with his family. They spend their days revisiting Kendall's old life, but it isn't until Kendall takes Carlos to his old ice rink that Carlos really realizes how desperate Kendall is to play hockey again.

He looks around in awe as they walk in, Kendall leading the way with confidence through the lobby and out to the actual ice, and after a long moment of silence watching the skaters Kendall turns to Carlos with an unreadable look on his face.

"Come skating with me?" he asks, so soft Carlos has to lean in to hear him.

"I thought you couldn't."

"I can't play hockey. I'd be okay just being out there, if I take it easy." The unreadable look is pleading now, almost, and Carlos smiles gently. Kendall's probably stretching the truth, but Carlos can't help but give in.

"Of course, beautiful," he says, bumping Kendall's shoulder playfully. "Just promise not to laugh at me when I fall on my ass, I've never skated before."

"I can teach you," is Kendall's immediate response, and Carlos just smiles.

Kendall's face is alight with a fire Carlos hasn't ever seen before, his excitement palpable as they rent skates and lace up - Carlos might wobble a few times as he gets used to walking on the blades, but Kendall's there to grab his hand and steady him, so at least he doesn't fall.

"C'mon, let's go," Kendall urges, leading Carlos to the ice and stepping onto it. Carlos watches as an air of confidence falls over him, in awe of how utterly natural he looks as he coaxes Carlos out and takes both his hands to stop him from falling.

"Fuck, this is hard." Carlos feels himself slipping backwards and immediately yanks his hands free of Kendall's to grip the sideboards, his face heating up as Kendall laughs.

"You just have to get your balance, babe. Let me show you."

Carlos turns to see Kendall skate up behind him, graceful even after years of being off the ice, and then Kendall's hands are gripping his waist and steadying him.

"You're leaning back too far," he murmurs in Carlos's ear, and fuck, that is not fair, "balance on the balls of your feet more."

Carlos tries it, letting out a noise of triumph when he releases the wall and manages not to lose his balance again.

"Okay, now what?" he asks, and Kendall grins happily at him.

"There's two edges to the blade," he starts, skating around in front of Carlos and turning so they're facing each other before taking Carlos's hands again, "turn your toes out and use the inside edge to push yourself forward - if you try to skate like you walk you'll fall on your ass."

Carlos makes a face as he attempts it, pushing himself forward with more force than he anticipated and ends up colliding with Kendall, who only laughs.

"Yeah, like that. To stop, though, you gotta use the outside edge."

Carlos just eyes him and says, "You know I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Here, I'll show you."

Before Carlos can respond Kendall takes off, skating a lap around the rink and heading right for Carlos, and when he stops a spray of snow cascades up into Carlos's face.

"Like that."

"You realize I have no idea what you did, since you got snow in my eyes," Carlos says drily, but the impish grin on Kendall's face makes the water he wipes away worth it.

"It's okay, I got you." Kendall grins and takes his hands again, and hours later Carlos finally calls a break - he can see that Kendall's knee is really bothering him, though it's obvious to Carlos that Kendall doesn't want to leave the ice.

Soon, Carlos thinks.

They stay at Kendall's house again for dinner, Mrs. Knight making a pasta that's better than anything Carlos has ever had before so he asks for the recipe, promising that she'll get full credit for it. She stares at him in shock for a few seconds before Katie orders her to hand it over, because how many people can say they made a recipe for a famous restaurant?

Carlos decides he really likes Kendall's family.


	14. Chapter 14

Longer one this time - there's only one or two more chapters left, to everyone that reads this, thank you. Your reviews and encouragement mean so much to me.

* * *

It isn't until they're home that Kendall brings up hockey again - Carlos hadn't pushed, knowing that Kendall had a lot to process.

"So I was thinking," Kendall says softly from where he's laying with his head in Carlos's lap as they watch TV their first night home. Carlos mutes the TV and looks down at him, a smirk tugging at his lips.

"Don't hurt yourself."

"Ass." Kendall swats Carlos's thigh and rolls onto his back to look Carlos in the eye. "I wanna talk to Logan. About that surgery."

Carlos nods and reaches down to card a hand through Kendall's hair.

"I was wondering how long it'd take for you to bring it up," he says with a gentle smile.

"It was that obvious?"

"Yeah." Carlos nods and begins massaging Kendall's scalp. "The way you looked on the ice…I've never seen you look that happy before. You belong there."

Kendall blushes and buries his face in Carlos's thigh.

"You're the only thing that's ever made me as happy," comes the muffled response, and Carlos laughs softly.

"Good," is all he says. "We can talk to Logan at dinner tonight, what about that?"

Kendall nods, rolling back over to look at Carlos again.

"Thank you," he whispers. "I can never repay you for everything you've done for me, Carlos."

"I love you," Carlos says simply. "You being by my side is enough."

"I love you too," Kendall responds, his cheeks coloring, both of them jumping a little as the door bangs open as Logan and James enter.

"You two make me sick," Logan comments as he helps James out of his jacket, but he's smiling and Carlos knows he doesn't really mean it.

"Oh come on, you're just as bad," Kendall retorts, sitting up and chucking a pillow at Logan's head. James catches it and whips it back, catching Kendall right in the face. He cackles with laughter as Kendall lets out a battle cry and leaps off the couch to tackle James to the ground, Logan and Carlos both rolling their eyes as they head into the kitchen to start dinner.

"So Kendall wants to talk to you about his surgery," Carlos comments as he heads to the fridge.

"Does he?" Logan looks surprised as he takes chicken breasts from Carlos and goes to preheat the oven. "What brought it on?"

"This whole weekend." Carlos tosses Logan a few more things from the fridge and goes to get dishes. "Dude, I got to meet his mom, they made up and everything, and he took me skating."

"Not his dad?" Logan asks as he starts cutting the chicken up, and Carlos shakes his head.

"No, his dad's not around. I don't know why, and I didn't ask. I think it's a sore subject."

"Well at least he made up with his mom." Logan shakes his head again as he hears a crash from the living room, knowing James and Kendall are probably breaking things. "So skating, huh? I'd pay a lot to see you do that."

"Fuck off," Carlos retorts easily, flicking the back of Logan's head and laughing. "I sucked, but he really had fun teaching me, I think. It took a lot out of him, I had to fake being tired to get him to stop, he didn't want to."

"Yeah, his knee isn't going to be able to take exertion like that for long," Logan says, cuffing Carlos on the back of his head when he turns around. "Stop being a dick and let me cook, fucker. If he brings it up at dinner I'll get an appointment set up for him first thing tomorrow, our orthopedist is in early."

"Thanks, dude," Carlos says gratefully. "But you can actually do the surgery, right?"

"He's really better off with an orthopedic surgeon." Logan gestures for Carlos to hand him the salt that's sitting on the counter. "I mean, I can give him a physical and shit, and I could _do_ the surgery, but I'm not a specialist and that's really what he needs, especially after so long."

Carlos nods, eyes narrowing at the sudden silence in the living room.

"They're awfully quiet in there," he says suspiciously, but then they're both walking into the kitchen, looking like they're trying not to look guilty.

"What'd you break?" Logan asks with a resigned sigh, and Carlos can't help but laugh as they blush in tandem.

"It was Kendall's fault!" James protests, making Kendall shove him indignantly.

"You pushed me into it!" he shoots back, looking for all the world like a kid waiting to be reprimanded, and Logan just rolls his eyes.

"Bookcase?" he guesses, and both of them nod sheepishly. "How bad?"

"I'll replace it," Kendall mutters, clearly embarrassed, making Carlos laugh again.

"We'll look at it after dinner, maybe we can fix it."

Kendall fixes him with a grateful look before turning to smack James on the chest again.

"Enough," Logan groans, but he's smiling. "Babe, go get some wine, please, and Kendall, can you help me serve everyone?"

They obey immediately, and Carlos fights a smile as they all sit down to eat, faking a gagging noise as James pulls out Logan's chair for him and kisses his cheek.

"Disgusting," Kendall teases as he pulls Carlos's chair out for him, making Logan roll his eyes.

"Shut up and eat your food."

"Yeah yeah. Thanks, by the way, it looks awesome." Kendall grins at Logan as he sits down, and silence overtakes the table as they all start eating. After a long silence Kendall takes a drink of wine and turns to Logan.

"I wanna talk to you about something after dinner," he says, looking determined. Carlos reaches down to squeeze his knee in encouragement as Logan smiles knowingly.

"Surgery?" he asks, and Kendall nods. "You don't have to wait until after dinner, dude, I don't mind talking now."

"You sure?" Kendall asks, and Carlos thinks he understands; talking to Logan about this around the rest of them means he's truly part of the little family they've created, something Carlos thinks he's probably still been resisting a little.

"Yeah, it's cool."

"I just…" Kendall trails off and reaches down to take Carlos's hand, "I wanna do it. And Carlos said you could help me, so…"

"You work tomorrow?" Logan asks, seeming to surprise Kendall, who glances at Carlos. He does, but not until the afternoon shift.

"Come in whenever you need to, I'll make sure you're covered," he says with a smile.

"Good." Logan smiles at Carlos before turning back to Kendall. "Come into work with me tomorrow morning, I'll get you set up with our orthopedic surgeon for an exam."

"Wait, not with you?" Kendall asks, sounding slightly panicked. Logan reaches across the table to squeeze his arm.

"I'm not a specialist, but the guy you'll see is a good friend of mine," he soothes, and Kendall seems to calm slightly at that, "I'll even go in with you if you want."

"I…thanks," Kendall finally says, voice barely audible. "I just wouldn't know what to do on my own."

"No problem." Logan waves off the thank you with a smile. "It's what friends do."

"Thank you," Kendall says again, and Carlos can hear the gratitude in his voice. "I really appreciate it."

They fall silent after that, Carlos leaning over to kiss Kendall's cheek as they finish eating, and for the first time Carlos senses a deep contentment in Kendall. It makes him smile.

Kendall is shaken awake by Logan the next morning at an ungodly hour, but as soon as he remembers why Logan's bothering him he gets out of bed and dresses at record speed. Logan hands him a cup of coffee and they climb into his car and head to the hospital, nerves gripping Kendall again as they walk in.

"Don't be nervous," Logan says with a smile, correctly interpreting Kendall's silence, "the doctor you're gonna see has been doing this forever, he's the best you can get."

"Okay." Kendall nods, vaguely wondering _why_ he's so nervous as Logan leads him through the hospital and to an exam room. Logan doesn't leave his side, staying with him through the exam and even accompanying him when they take him for X-rays and MRIs.

It means a lot to Kendall that Logan's doing this - after the rocky start they had he finally feels like he can call Logan a friend, which is cemented by Logan's hand on his shoulder as Kendall talks to the orthopedist.

There's a lot of things that Kendall doesn't understand, but he trusts Logan to explain it, which he does immediately after the orthopedist leaves to get his X-rays.

"You okay?" Logan asks with a knowing smile, grabbing a stool and plopping down onto it. "You look like you're gonna be sick or something."

"I just...it's surreal, I never thought I'd be able to do this," Kendall says, running a hand through his hair. Logan nods in understanding and leans forward to brace his elbows on his knees.

"So what they're gonna do is called a patellar tendon graft," he says, smirking slightly at the confused look on Kendall's face, "basically they're reconstructing your knee with tendons from other parts of your body."

"And then my knee will be normal again?" Kendall asks, leaning back on his hands on the exam table.

"As normal as it'll ever be," Logan agrees. "You'll go to physical therapy after you heal, it'll take some time before you finally feel like yourself again."

"Yeah, I figured that much." Kendall nods in understanding. "But I'll be able to play hockey again, right? That's the whole reason I'm doing this."

"Not at first, you're barely gonna be able to walk. You have to make sure you don't push it or you'll be worse off than you are now," Logan cautions, and Kendall nods again; he's not stupid enough to ruin his chances, even though he knows he'll be impatient.

"But eventually?" he asks, hearing the urgency in his voice.

"Yeah, eventually."

Kendall breathes a small sigh of relief.

"Okay. So what happens now?"

"Dr. Morrison looks at your X-rays and MRI results, and then we'll get a date set for the surgery."

"Okay," Kendall says, feeling emotion grip him. "And...thank you, for doing this for me. I'll never be able to thank you enough."

"It's what friends do." Logan waves off the thank you and smiles gently. "And I owe you an apology for the way I acted when you and Carlos first got together. I was wrong about you, Kendall, you're someone I count lucky to call my friend."

"Thanks," Kendall says softly, looking at the floor, "sometimes I feel like I don't know what I did to deserve any of you guys, you don't know how much it means to hear you say that."

"Seriously?" Kendall hears Logan stand and then he's being enveloped in a hug, which is still a little uncomfortable but he returns it, feeling like that last gap between them has been bridged. "You're a great guy, Kendall, Carlos wouldn't love you so much if you weren't."

When he pulls away Kendall smiles, finally feeling at ease.

"You're a pretty great guy too," he says, and Logan smiles back.

"Thanks. You wanna get lunch after this? I think Carlos would enjoy it if we bonded."

"That'd be great." Kendall's immediate answer surprises him, but he really does want to get to know Logan better.

"Cool." Logan grins at him and falls silent as Dr. Morrison returns, and together they go over Kendall's X-rays, Dr. Morrison explaining that his MRI results will be gone over by a radiologist and the results passed on to Kendall once they're done.

A follow up exam is scheduled for a few days later, and as Kendall walks out of the hospital Logan slings an arm around him. Kendall stiffens for a split second but the discomfort quickly dissipates and he relaxes into the embrace.

"So where to?" Logan asks once they're in his car. Kendall shrugs indifferently.

"I don't really care," he says, and Logan makes a face at him, "don't look at me like that, where's someplace you haven't eaten in awhile?"

"Where's someplace _you_ haven't eaten in awhile?" Logan counters with a wicked grin. "Two can play this game, and _I_ grew up with Carlos. You can't win."

Kendall just laughs.

"Don't knock my man," he teases, punching Logan on the shoulder playfully, "let's get pizza, how's that sound?"

"Unhealthy," Logan retorts as he starts the car and pulls out of the parking garage. "So Carlos said you spent time with your family this weekend?"

"Yeah." Kendall settles back into the seat as Logan drives, his eyes falling closed. "I haven't seen my mom in a long time, it was nice to be home."

"I bet," Logan agrees, and Kendall hears his fingers drumming on the steering wheel. "Can I ask where your dad is?"

Kendall stiffens slightly at the mention of his father, cracking an eye open to look at Logan, relaxing when he only sees curiosity in his gaze.

"He left when I was fifteen," Kendall finally answers. "He was an alcoholic, we were better off without him." His eyes close again as Logan lets out a noise of sympathy.

"I'm sorry, dude. That must've been hard."

"Yeah." Kendall shrugs indifferently, he's long since over it. "He was a dick, though, used to scream at my mom in front of Katie when he'd come home drunk and then scream at Katie for crying."

"Katie?"

"My sister," Kendall supplies, having forgotten that Logan hasn't met his family. "She's seventeen, she's scary as hell sometimes, but she's the best sister in the world."

"Scary how?" Logan asks, and Kendall hears the curiosity without needing to open his eyes.

"Like evil genius scary. She just graduated high school, a year early, when she was ten she conned all of our neighborhood out of like, five grand by selling lemonade or something." Kendall laughs softly at the memory of Katie's petulance when their mother had ordered her to return the money. "My mom made her give it all back, she was so pissed. I don't even know how she did it."

Kendall cracks an eye open again when Logan laughs.

"I bet you were glad to see her," he says with a grin.

"Carlos was terrified of her," Kendall laughs. "The first thing she did when she saw me was deck me, I think he almost had a heart attack."

"I bet," Logan agrees, laughing again. "That night you came to our house injured I think he had a six hour long panic attack."

Kendall immediately stops laughing.

"He told you what happened?" he asks sharply. Logan immediately sobers, looking guilty.

"All he said was that you were hurt and had welts, he just wanted to know what to do for you." Logan's voice is hesitant, clearly worried about how Kendall will react. "He was so worried about you, I've never seen him look like that. That's when I knew you were something special, even though I didn't want to admit it."

Kendall ponders this, ultimately deciding that he doesn't mind that Logan, and probably James, knows what happened that night.

"I felt bad I'd scared him so much," he finally says, voice soft. "I didn't even think about where I was going when I ran out of there, I just ran."

"Do you..." Logan trails off and seems to war with himself before continuing. "D'you wanna talk about what happened? All Carlos said was that whoever you were with went too far."

Kendall shrugs and doesn't answer. Logan reaches over to squeeze his knee in reassurance.

"I won't judge, I promise. You must've been pretty shaken to scare Carlos that bad."

Kendall's eyes squeeze shut as he replies, "I've never been so angry before. I hit the guy that did it to me."

"Whipped?" Logan guesses softly, and Kendall nods, his fists clenching as the memories wash over him.

"Yeah. That was one of my rules, no whipping or anything that left a mark. Stupid fucker loved to humiliate me though, I think he had it in for me ever since he ran into me on my first date with Carlos and I blew him off."

"Why'd you go, then?" Logan asks, and Kendall opens his eyes to see they're at the pizza place. He doesn't move yet; this isn't a conversation to have in public.

"He offered me a lot of money. I needed it."

"Why?" Logan asks again, and Kendall shrugs, knowing that Logan's not asking about his client.

"I had to make money somehow; working at Carlos's didn't pay me enough for rent and school, I didn't want to drop out again."

"Again?"

"Again," Kendall agrees with a resigned sigh. "I went to UCLA on a full ride scholarship for hockey, but I got hit by a drunk driver two years ago, right before the end of my junior year. I couldn't pay for college without the scholarship, and they yanked it because I couldn't play. So I dropped out."

"Jesus, Kendall." Logan squeezes Kendall's knee again. "Didn't you appeal it?"

"Yeah, of course," Kendall responds, his hand covering Logan's. "But I didn't know when I'd be able to play again; the university was going to cover part of my surgery and I could've worked something out for the rest if I had to, but since I couldn't give them a date they said they'd be revoking it and could reevaluate the decision later. I told them to fuck off and decided not to have the surgery."

"So you decided to be a hooker?" Logan asks, confusion evident in his voice.

Kendall laughs, surprising himself when he does it without bitterness.

"Yeah, that was my dream job," he teases gently. "I started out just dating people; I ran into another guy that worked at the agency, and when he realized I wasn't interested in fucking him he recruited me. I started off just dating women for money, I figured that wasn't that bad."

"Women?" Logan asks, clearly surprised. "I thought you were gay."

"No," Kendall laughs. "I had a girlfriend all through college, stupid bitch dumped me when she realized I wasn't going to graduate and be a NHL player. Said I was a deadbeat and that she wanted to be with someone who was gonna do something with their life...not like I'd almost just died and was lucky I could walk, or anything."

"Charming," Logan says drily. "But if you're not gay-"

"I love Carlos," Kendall interjects firmly, seeing where Logan's train of thought is going. "My agency started asking me to go on dates with men after awhile; they didn't have a lot of guys willing to, and by that point I'd already started having sex with the women they set me up with, so there wasn't much more I could do to make money but that."

"Oh." Logan looks slightly abashed. "Sorry, it just surprised me to hear that you'd had a girlfriend."

"It's okay," Kendall says, and he means it. "We should go inside, we can keep discussing my career as a hooker over pizza if you want."

"I don't care, I was really just curious," Logan says as he opens the door and climbs out. "I don't understand it, having sex with strangers. Was it...I don't know. Did you ever enjoy it?"

Kendall's silent as they walk in and are led to a table, waiting until their server is gone to answer.

"Sometimes I did." He shrugs and takes a drink of water. "Sometimes it was awful, like when the woman's husband would come home while we were fucking and try to kick the shit out of me."

"Did that happen?" Logan asks, sounding like he's trying to disguise his horror. Kendall shrugs again.

"Only a few times, usually I was able to get out before they landed any punches," he says. "The women were smart, they knew when their husbands would be home…I only got the shit kicked out of me one time. I ended up in the hospital."

"Shit, Kendall." Logan looks like he doesn't know what to say to that. "I'm sorry."

"It's in the past," Kendall says without any bitterness, "those were rare occasions, most of the time I just went home disgusted with myself."

Logan smiles sympathetically and reaches across the table to squeeze Kendall's hand.

"I don't blame you, but as long as you forgive yourself that's what's important."

"I'm starting to," Kendall agrees softly. "Carlos helps."

"You help him too." Logan takes a sip of his water and smiles again, a true one now. "I've never seen him as happy as he is with you, and you have no idea how lonely he was…James and I used to bug him to go out on a date with anyone, we just wanted him to find someone. He always refused. Until you showed up, that is."

"I still think that was partially pity." Kendall laughs as he remembers the look on Carlos's face upon seeing Kendall on the doorstep. "He had no idea what to do with me, it was kind of adorable."

"He yelled at me in the kitchen for hiring you," Logan laughs in agreement. "He was about to send you home, I convinced him to take you with him."

"You did?" Kendall asks in surprise. "But you had such a problem with me."

Logan's cheeks color slightly again.

"Yeah..." he trails off and picks at his napkin. "I was hoping a date with an, uh, escort, would spur him into finding someone. It wasn't supposed to be you, you were just supposed to make him realize that he's awesome and deserves someone that loves him."

Kendall is silent at Logan's admission, mulling it over. Hurt slices through him at Logan's callousness, but as he remembers how Logan has acted since then the hurt slowly ebbs.

"Why wasn't it supposed to be me?" he asks. Logan's cheeks flush brighter.

"Mostly old prejudices. I was raised by really conservative parents, they used to talk all the time about how sex before marriage was wrong and I got a lecture from my dad once about how prostitutes are sinners and going to hell and..." he trails off again and shrugs. "I didn't think any of it had actually stuck until you came into our lives."

Kendall nods in understanding, glad he finally knows why Logan acted the way he did.

"How'd they take your relationship with James?" Kendall meets Logan's eyes and smiles gently, knowing Logan understands that Kendall forgives him. Logan scoffs softly and shakes his head at what is clearly a painful memory.

"If it had been anyone else I'd have tried to hide it, but since James is, well, James, it was virtually impossible. Even when we were just friends the paparazzi were all over us, my dad actually called me after we got caught holding hands, asking me what the fuck I thought I was doing."

Kendall sucks in a breath but doesn't say anything, wondering how long Logan's kept all this inside.

"The bastard told me that I wasn't welcome in his house as his son anymore," Logan goes on, and Kendall reaches across the table to grab his hand and squeeze, "said that if I was going to be a disgusting faggot that I was dead to him."

"Logan, Jesus." Kendall squeezes Logan's hand tight, smiling sympathetically when Logan's hand flips over and his fingers lace with Kendall's.

"My mom talked some sense into him. It took a long time, but they're as okay with it as they'll ever be."

"Sometimes that's all you can ask for," Kendall agrees, wondering at how close he and Logan have suddenly become. Logan seems to have the same thought as he looks down at their hands, a rueful laugh escaping him.

"Not even James knows what my dad said to me," Logan chuckles. "What is it about you?"

"I could ask you the same thing," Kendall resorts, releasing Logan's hand and sitting back. "Carlos doesn't know that much detail about when I was hooking, so we're even."

"We are," Logan agrees. "And not that I think you're going to go running to James, but-"

"I'll keep your secrets if you keep mine," Kendall interjects with a smile. "It's not my place to say anything anyway."

"And it's not mine." Logan settles back into his own seat and smiles gratefully at Kendall, who smiles back. Carlos isn't the only one that's amazing, he thinks. He got some pretty awesome friends out of the deal, too.


	15. Chapter 15

Only one or two more chapters left!

* * *

As they head home after lunch Kendall ponders the day; he and Logan had spent most of the time talking, becoming close in a way Kendall hasn't ever been with anyone, even Carlos.

Logan seems to feel the same way, slinging an arm over Kendall's shoulders on the way in. James shoots them a look that makes it clear he's a little jealous, and Kendall grins back as his hand comes up to cover Logan's where it's draped over his shoulder.

"Relax," he finally says when James's look turns into a glare. "I'm not stealing him, we just bonded."

"Okay." James is still eyeing Kendall suspiciously, but it fades as Logan unwraps his arm from Kendall and plops down on James's lap unceremoniously.

"He couldn't, anyway," Kendall hears Logan say softly, and James seems to relax the rest of the way at that.

"I don't want to, anyway," Kendall adds as he sits down next to James. "Logan's great and all, but he's not Carlos."

"Watch it, Knight," James warns, but his tone is playful now.

"I said he's great!" Kendall protests, laughing as James swats at him and it hits him then, how thoroughly these people have become part of his life.

"Don't you have work to go to or something? Leave me and Logan alone?" James gives Kendall a look, making Kendall laugh again as he stands up.

"Subtle, Diamond. I'll leave you two to fuck on the couch in peace."

"Thanks!" Logan calls as Kendall departs, and as Kendall pulls out his phone he sees Carlos has texted him. He immediately calls Carlos instead of texting back, smiling when Carlos picks up.

"Hey, beautiful. How'd it go?"

Kendall finds he can never fight the ridiculous smile those words bring.

"Good, I have a follow up exam scheduled in a few days to go over my MRI and then we set a date." Kendall hears Carlos let out a breath, he'd obviously been nervous.

"That's awesome, babe. You eat lunch? I can come home and pick you up before your shift starts."

"Logan and I got pizza," Kendall says, immediately feeling guilty, but all Carlos does is laugh.

"You did?" he asks, and Kendall hears the smile in his voice. "How'd that go?"

"We bonded," Kendall says, imagining Carlos's face lighting up at that. "And he apologized for being a douchebag, back when you and I first got together."

"Damn, really?" Carlos sounds shocked - it makes Kendall wonder what Logan has said about him. "I'm glad he did, you're amazing and anyone that thinks otherwise is an idiot."

Kendall's cheeks heat up - there's a part of him that'll never quite understand what Carlos sees in him, but he'll never take it for granted, either.

"Stop." He smiles despite himself, but as soon as he realizes how girly he sounds the smile morphs into a grimace, disgusted at how sappy he is. "Come home and get me so I can go to work?"

"On my way," is Carlos's immediate response, bringing the smile back to Kendall's face. "We gotta get you a car, beautiful."

"You know I can't afford that yet," Kendall says, shaking his head. He can almost hear Carlos's thoughts, knowing what his next words will be and preempting them with, "And don't you dare buy me one."

Carlos only laughs and says, "What if _I_ got a new one? You could just have mine."

"Carlos," Kendall warns, knowing he's probably already lost this argument and he'll come home one day to see a new car with a big red bow on it in the driveway, "please, babe, you know how I feel about that kind of stuff."

"We can argue about it when I get there," Carlos retorts, and Kendall can hear the grin on his face, the excitement over getting something like this for Kendall.

"We can't, but get here anyway," Kendall shoots back, smiling when Carlos laughs.

"Okay, okay. I'll be there in ten." They say their goodbyes and hang up, Kendall shaking his head when he hears a poorly disguised moan come from the living room.

"You'd better clean that couch!" he calls as he heads outside to wait for Carlos. James or Logan calls back a, "Shut up, Kendall!"

It makes him laugh.

Fifteen minutes later Carlos is in the driveway, pulling Kendall in for a kiss once he's settled in the passenger seat.

"Hi, beautiful."

"You're crazy, have I ever told you that?" Kendall asks, trying and failing to keep the smile off his face.

"You love it," Carlos retorts with a grin. "You can't hide it from me."

"Ass," Kendall mutters, but Carlos is right; Kendall is never as happy as he is when he's with Carlos.

* * *

Carlos accompanies Kendall to his follow up exam this time - he hadn't minded that Logan went before, but this is something he knows he wants to be a part of. Kendall seems to take comfort from his presence as they wait in the exam room, the doctor filling Carlos in on the procedure and they set a date for the surgery at the end of the following week.

The time seems to fly by. Before Carlos knows it it's the morning of the surgery, and he's up at practically the crack of dawn, restless and nervous. Kendall manages to sleep most of the night, but Carlos can tell he's cranky when he comes downstairs about an hour after Carlos.

"I can't have breakfast?" he whines, wincing as Logan comes down behind him and cuffs him on the back of the head.

"You can have a little water, but that's it."

"This fucking sucks." Kendall scowls at Logan and looks like he has to bite down on the urge to hit him back, but Logan shoots him a sympathetic smile and he seems to calm.

"C'mon, beautiful, sit down." Carlos pulls out a chair and motions Kendall into it, massaging his shoulders once he's seated. "Relax, Kendall, please."

"It's gonna be fine," Logan adds, setting a glass of water down in front of Kendall. "The fasting sucks, though, I know."

"It does," Kendall agrees with a growl, but he's relaxing under Carlos's ministrations and that's what's important. "I just want this to be over with."

"Soon," Carlos murmurs, leaning down to kiss his cheek. He hears Kendall huff out a sigh as he drinks the water and cards a hand through Kendall's hair.

"You wanna get going? I'm coming with you guys, I'm supervising the procedure."

Kendall's eyes whip up to Logan and Carlos sees a grateful smile cross his face, knowing there's a matching one on his own.

"You are?" Kendall asks, and Carlos hears the disbelief in his voice.

"Yeah. I took this morning off to make sure I could be there." Logan grins at them both, and Carlos has never been more grateful to have Logan as his friend.

"You're the best," he says, making Logan blush.

"Where's James?" Kendall asks after a moment of silence passes over them.

"He left a few hours ago for a gig in Chicago. He says good luck and that you'd better come home because he needs someone's ass to kick at all his video games."

"Asshole," Kendall laughs, but they all hear the affection in his voice. "Okay, let's go, I'm ready to get this over with."

He rises and immediately reaches for Carlos's hand, and Carlos takes it without hesitation, squeezing it tight as they climb into the car and head to the hospital. Logan takes charge once they've parked and gone inside, leaving Carlos to keep Kendall calm.

Carlos hasn't ever seen Kendall this on edge. He knows a lot of it is from not eating or drinking for over eight hours, but the rest of it is nerves. He doesn't blame Kendall at all.

After a good forty five minutes of filling out paperwork and getting Kendall checked in they're led to a pre-op room, where a nurse asks Kendall a bunch of questions Carlos doesn't understand the need for. Logan shoots them both a reassuring glance before he and the nurse step out of the room to allow Kendall to change, and Kendall immediately turns to Carlos with panic in his eyes.

"Whoa, none of that, beautiful." Carlos takes Kendall's face in his hands, thumbs caressing his cheeks as he wills Kendall to relax. "Please, baby, take a deep breath and relax for me. It's gonna be okay."

"What kind of question is 'do you have papers that have a do-not-resuscitate request'?" Kendall asks, and Carlos pulls him close, hoping his presence will be enough to soothe a question he can't answer.

"When Logan comes back we'll ask," he murmurs, coaxing Kendall out of his clothes and into the hospital gown. Kendall's trembling ever so slightly as he sits back down, and Carlos sticks his head out of the room to call Logan back in.

"Kendall needs you to explain something," Carlos murmurs as Logan passes him.

"What's wrong?" Logan says when his eyes fall on Kendall.

"Why would they ask me if I want to be resuscitated?" Kendall asks desperately, and Logan immediately sits down next to him and wraps an arm around his shoulders.

"It's a routine question," Logan soothes, and Carlos stays back, knowing Logan will help best right now. "The hospital can get in trouble for resuscitating someone that doesn't want it, but the chances of anything happening right now are slim, Kendall. It's just your knee we're working on, and fasting helps lower the risks, okay? That's why you have to."

"Okay," Kendall says, and Carlos can still hear the trepidation in his voice as he takes a deep breath. "Okay. Thanks."

"You don't have to thank me." Logan squeezes Kendall tight, and Carlos breathes a sigh of relief when he sees Kendall relax completely.

"You ready now?" Logan asks after a moment of silence. Carlos walks over and grips Kendall's shoulder, shooting Logan a grateful smile.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm ready." Kendall's voice is confident now, so Logan stands and goes to call the nurse in, and while he's distracted Carlos leans down to kiss Kendall gently.

"You're gonna be okay, beautiful. Just think about what happens after this."

"You baby me for a few weeks?" Kendall jokes softly, his hands reaching for Carlos's and squeezing. Carlos laughs in agreement.

"Yeah, I'll be your personal servant while you recover."

"Awesome." Kendall grins up at him. "I love you."

"I love you too." Carlos kisses him one more time before stepping back as the nurse approaches. He's allowed to follow them into the operating room, and takes Kendall's hand as the anesthetic is administered, mouthing, "I love you" once more as Kendall falls unconscious.

* * *

The surgery goes off without a hitch - Carlos is right by Kendall's side when he awakes, smiling down at him when he blinks sleepily.

"Do I still have my leg?" Kendall asks, voice hoarse but he's smiling, and Carlos laughs.

"Nope, they cut it off," he teases, and for a split second Kendall looks terrified, but then realization hits him and he slaps Carlos playfully.

"Ass." He's smiling though, so Carlos knows he's not upset. "When do I get to go home?"

"Soon," Logan interjects, walking up to the bed and smiling down at Kendall. "It went perfectly, by the way. You'll wear a splint on your knee for at least six weeks, and after your follow up visit in a few weeks to take the staples in your knee out you'll start physical therapy."

"Oh boy," Kendall groans, but he can't seem to keep the grin off his face.

"For a few weeks your mobility will be limited, though," Logan cautions, looking at Carlos too now. "You won't be able to drive, and Dr. Morrison and I both want you on crutches at home."

"Okay." Kendall's still grinning as he looks up at Carlos. "You'll take care of me?"

"Course I will," Carlos laughs. "I'll cater to your every whim."

"No sex until he's healed," Logan says firmly, making them both laugh. "I'm serious."

"We know," Kendall says, holding up his hands in surrender. "We'll be good, I promise."

"Promise," Carlos echoes with a rueful grin. "Can we get him home now?"

"Please?" Kendall adds.

They both laugh as Logan rolls his eyes and calls for an orderly, muttering something about needing new friends. About an hour later they're finally home, Kendall groaning about pain and crutches and being hungry, and Carlos knows he's not supposed to find it as adorable as he does, but he can't help it.

"C'mon, beautiful, let's get you set up on the couch." He helps Kendall inside and to the couch in the den, motioning for Kendall to stay put as he gets pillows and a blanket.

"Get him an extra pillow, he needs to elevate his leg," Logan instructs as he walks past them into the kitchen. "Kendall, I'm getting you ice, make sure you use it!"

"Yes, mom!" Kendall calls back, making Carlos snicker.

"Be nice, he knows how to make you pay," he warns, kissing Kendall's forehead once the pillows are all in place. "What do you want to eat? I'll make something."

"Hey mom, what kind of food can I have?" Kendall calls into the kitchen, a wicked grin on his face.

"Keep it up and you won't eat!" Logan sounds like he's trying not to laugh, making Kendall and Carlos look at each other and grin. Carlos shakes his head as he heads into the kitchen, smirking at Logan.

"Something light, I assume?"

"You're a fucking ass," Logan mutters, swinging the ice pack in the direction of Carlos's face, but he ducks and Logan misses.

"Missed!" he crows, and Logan laughs this time.

"Something light," he agrees over his shoulder as he walks back into the den. Carlos immediately sets about making Kendall toast, and he knows he's spoiling Kendall when he makes chocolate milk, too, but the way Kendall's face lights up when he brings it into the den is totally worth it.

"You're the best," he says happily as Logan helps set up a tray.

"Anything for you." Carlos carefully sits down at Kendall's feet, lifting his legs and sliding under them so Kendall's knee is propped up on his lap. "This comfortable?"

"As good as it'll get," Kendall says, smiling gratefully. "Logan, I have pain medication, right?"

"Yes, but don't overdo it." Logan sets a prescription bottle on the tray. "Take this when it's really bad, otherwise take Advil or something. You can get addicted to this shit."

"Got it." Kendall nods as Logan sets a bottle of Advil down too, taking three out and downing them along with his milk. "When's James gonna be home?"

"Tomorrow night." Logan ruffles Kendall's hair playfully, laughing when Kendall shoos his hand away. "That's for the mom comment, asshole."

"Love you too." Kendall sticks his tongue out at Logan, making Carlos laugh.

"Eat your toast before it gets cold," he instructs, and as Kendall takes a bite and grins at him Carlos suddenly can't wait for him to get better.


	16. Chapter 16

This is the second to last chapter - they're both short, but I'd rather split them than combine it into one. To everyone that's kept reading it for this long, thank you so much. It means the world to me.

* * *

The first few days after Kendall's surgery are rough. He can barely move on his own, but Carlos doesn't seem to mind helping him, which is good because Kendall can't even shower by himself yet.

He hates feeling like an invalid. But still, he knows it'll all be worth it eventually, and after a week he can manage well enough on the crutches. His professors at UCLA have been emailing him most of his assignments, which keeps him busy during the day while Carlos is at work.

James helps, too, distracting Kendall with video games and just generally being James. Kendall's never had a friend like him before. He repays James by helping him run lines for auditions he's been going out for in an effort to "broaden his horizons," as he'd put it.

Kendall's a terrible actor, but he seems to help well enough, James always looks pleased after they finish. He flops down on the couch after they take a break one afternoon, head falling back onto the cushions as he turns to grin at Kendall.

"I think I have a good shot at this one."

"I think so too," Kendall agrees, grinning back. "Not like I'm an authority or anything, but you know. You're good."

"Thanks, dude." James's cheeks flush a little, making Kendall chuckle. "So how you holding up? Carlitos taking good care of you?"

"Best nursemaid ever," Kendall agrees, shifting slightly in an effort to get more comfortable. "I'm sick of being immobile, though, I didn't realize how much I liked being able to walk."

"Yeah, walking's nice." James affects a dreamy tone and smirks at Kendall. "I can go wherever I want, whenever I want, no one ever has to carry me, it's pretty awesome."

"Fucker." Kendall laughs again and chucks a pillow at James's face. "I just wanna be able to skate again."

"I bet. You were good, then?"

"Yeah, I'd been scouted and everything," Kendall says with a soft sigh. "I could've been playing professionally, starting even, if I hadn't had that accident."

James's expression sobers slightly, and he seems to war with himself before asking, "What happened? You don't have to tell me."

Kendall shrugs and says, "I don't mind telling you. I used to be really bitter over it, but since I started dating Carlos I'm pretty much over it."

"Really?"

"Yeah." Kendall nods, his head falling back onto the pillow behind him. "After it happened and I dropped out of school I almost ended up on the street...there was a time I really considered...you know."

"Suicide?" James asks in a hushed voice. Kendall shrugs.

"What did I have to live for? I couldn't afford school, I was a hooker, my girlfriend dumped me and I was ashamed to see my family. I figured it'd be easier."

James is silent for a long moment. Kendall doesn't look at him, unwilling to see the judgement he's sure is there.

"I guess I can see that," James finally says. "Like, I can see how you could get there. I'm glad you didn't, though."

"I don't think I ever would have," Kendall replies, looking up at James and smiling at the understanding in his face. "The only time I ever got that bad I thought about what it'd do to my mom and sister and realized I couldn't do that to them. It wasn't fair."

"Yeah. Plus, Carlos needs you," James adds with a grin, making Kendall laugh.

"I didn't know that then."

"Nah, but still." James laughs, punching Kendall playfully on the shoulder. "How's your knee?"

"Okay. It aches right now." Kendall reaches for a pillow, smiling gratefully at James when he hands it over and helps slide it under Kendall's leg.

"Does that actually help?"

"Sometimes. It's better when the pillow is on Carlos's lap," Kendall admits, surprised when James lifts his legs and slides under them.

"Like this?" he asks as he moves the pillow to his lap and settles Kendall's legs onto it.

"Yeah. Thanks, dude." Kendall smiles gratefully.

"No prob, it's what friends do." James smiles back, and they settle back to watch tv, both content.

* * *

The months seem to fly by, in Kendall's opinion. Before he knows it he's moving around on his own with the crutches and Logan allows him to go back to work for a couple days a week. That helps the most, just the simple act of having something to do with his day. Carlos temporarily moves him to the host station, since he's not mobile enough to wait tables yet.

Kendall doesn't mind.

Eventually he starts physical therapy, and for all that he knows it'll help him in the long run it's probably the worst kind of hell he's ever been put through. He thinks it's funny that Logan was worried about Kendall pushing himself too fast, but now that he's actually doing it he feels like _they're_ pushing _him_ too hard.

The physical therapist teaches Carlos massages to help relax Kendall's muscles, which he does every time Kendall comes home from from a session. Kendall wonders if he'll ever be able to repay Carlos for everything he's done, because Carlos hasn't complained once about any of this.

Maybe Carlos is some kind of figment of Kendall's imagination.

The thought makes him chuckle to himself as he and Carlos watch tv one night, Carlos's fingers steady and sure on his aching legs. He grins ruefully when Carlos turns and fixes him with a raised eyebrow, because they're watching Law & Order, and it's not one of the parts where laughing is appropriate.

"Are you real?" he teases, making Carlos fix him with a flat look.

"No, I'm a ghost. What the hell kind of question is that?"

Kendall laughs again, because he can; he hasn't felt this lighthearted in awhile, not since before his surgery.

"Did you take too much of your painkiller?" Carlos asks suspiciously, making Kendall laugh harder and shake his head.

"No. Just...really happy. And wondering if you're not some kind of figment of my imagination, or if I'm in a coma or something."

"Weirdo," Carlos mutters, but he's smiling now. "I'm monitoring your pill intake from now on."

"Yes, mom," Kendall laughs, sitting up and pulling Carlos into a kiss. "Thank you, for everything. I don't say it enough."

"You don't have to thank me," Carlos murmurs. "I love you."

"I love you too," Kendall murmurs back, pulling Carlos down with him as he lays back and basking in his presence. He's never as content as he is with Carlos close by.


	17. Chapter 17

Okay, this is it. I can't believe it's over. Thank you to everyone that's reviewed, and to everyone that's stuck with this from the beginning, thank you even more. Your support means so much.

If there's enough demand for it there's bits and pieces of a cheesy epilogue in my head, which would address a plot point I deliberately avoided. If you guys want one, let me know. :)

* * *

After close to a year Kendall is finally allowed back onto the ice. He's nervous, more nervous than he's ever been about anything before. The therapist tells him to take it slow, to not skate more than fifteen minutes, which seems pointless to Kendall but Carlos is coming with him, so at least they'll be together.

"You ready for this, beautiful?" Carlos asks as he laces up Kendall's skates for him, which is silly and unnecessary but it makes Kendall's heart swell with love. "I have a surprise for you."

"You do too much for me," he says, laughing despite himself when Carlos waves it off. Carlos walks them to the ice and motions for Kendall to stay put and Kendall folds his arms and glares playfully.

"Just watch," Carlos says in response to Kendall's glare, grinning as he steps onto the ice. A gasp leaves Kendall as he watches Carlos skate out into the center of the rink like he's been doing it for years.

"What do you think?" Carlos calls as he spins around and races back, a bright smile on his face and Kendall just stares, completely overwhelmed.

"What did you _do_?" he whispers once Carlos is at the edge of the ice again. Carlos's smile falters.

"I thought it'd be better if you had someone to skate with," he says, looking apprehensive now and Kendall can't even form words, can't even think because this is hands down the most incredible thing Carlos has _ever_ done for him.

"Kendall?" Carlos asks after Kendall still doesn't say anything. "Should I not have?"

"Carlos," Kendall rasps, throat closed with emotion. "You're amazing."

The relief that blossoms on Carlos's face is tangible, Kendall launching himself forward into Carlos's arms and knocking them flat.

"Ow, fuck," Carlos whines, but then Kendall is kissing him, silencing any protests as he tries to say with touch what he can't with words.

"I love you," he whispers between kisses. "So much."

Carlos laughs softly and kisses Kendall back for a moment before saying, "I love you too, but my ass is cold. Can I get up?"

Kendall bursts out laughing at that, knowing when he climbs off of Carlos that his eyes are red but he doesn't care, because he's the luckiest person in the entire world.

"C'mon," Carlos says as he stands and offers Kendall a hand, the bright smile back. "Let's skate."

_One year later..._

"When the fuck are they gonna put him in?"

"Carlos, shut up and watch, the period is almost over. They'll put him in after the second halftime, probably."

"Piss off, Logan I can't help being nervous. It's his first game!"

Logan sighs exasperatedly and smacks Carlos's arm, making him wince.

"Seriously. He's gonna be fine."

Carlos mutters to himself as he turns away from Logan to focus on the game, feeling almost sick with nerves. He knows Kendall's ready for this, no one would've let him near a game if he wasn't, but that doesn't stop his stomach from twisting into a knot or the death grip he's got on the armrest of his seat.

There's a part of Carlos that can't quite believe where he's ended up. After Kendall completed physical therapy six months ago he'd run into his old coach from UCLA, who'd been ecstatic to find out that he was skating again and immediately put in a call to the head coach of the LA Kings.

One practice session later Kendall had been signed. It was ridiculous and Carlos wasn't even sure it was possible, but even he can see how talented Kendall is, so maybe it makes sense.

They'd taken it slow, easing Kendall into practices with the other players, until he'd gotten clearance from his doctor to play in an actual game.

Which was why now, another six months later, Carlos, James, Logan, and Kendall's mother and sister are watching Kendall's first game in a VIP box - thanks partially to James's celebrity and the Kings' anticipation of Kendall stealing the show once he's on the ice.

"Carlos, breathe. Please. It's halftime."

Carlos's head snaps to look at Logan, who's eyeing him with concern.

"Sorry."

"Dude, please relax. He's gonna be fine." Logan reaches over to squeeze Carlos's shoulder, which is enough to get him to relax.

For the whole ten minutes of halftime, anyway. Katie lets out a noise as the players skate back out onto the ice, grabbing Mrs. Knight's arm and pointing at Kendall.

"Look, there he is!"

"I see him, Katie. Please don't break my arm," Mrs. Knight says, obviously trying to sound annoyed and Carlos laughs when he sees the excitement on her face.

His attention returns to the ice after that, though, cheering Kendall on as play resumes and Kendall immediately takes the puck. He doesn't know much about the rules of hockey, yet, but he's been trying to learn and knows enough to tell a bullshit penalty when he sees it. James is on his feet too, shouting at the referee that didn't penalize the player that just elbowed Kendall hard enough to fall, but then Kendall is up and has the puck and it's a blur after that, but Carlos can tell one thing.

Kendall is a star.

The Kings win in the last two minutes, Kendall managing to score what, to Carlos, an impossible goal but the crowd goes insane. Even Logan is on his feet, screaming along with the rest of them.

Eventually they make it down to the ice, where the entire team is clapping Kendall on the back and congratulating him, and Carlos hasn't ever seen him so happy.

Not until Kendall's eyes light on him, anyway. Kendall breaks away from the team and flies at Carlos, wrapping him up in a bone crushing hug.

"Thank you, thank you so much, Carlos," Kendall whispers in his ear. As Carlos squeezes Kendall back, he feels hot tears on his neck, feels his own eyes prick with tears because he knows how much this means to Kendall, and seeing Kendall's dreams come true is worth everything they've been through.

"Don't thank me." Carlos pulls back and kisses Kendall hard, saying with touch what he can't with words. "I told you, I got you."

When Kendall laughs and wipes his eyes Carlos smiles because finally, finally, everything is right and he knows Kendall feels it too.


End file.
